WEBVTT

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Hey everyone, all right, the last session about owning yourself, I've been very excited

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about this one.

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This is one that I began talking about maybe about a year ago, as I was noticing that people

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were struggling in the rest intensive to make decisions, in other words, to make choices

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for themselves.

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And I, and as I began to, oh, and then also they were struggling with, with relationships

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with other people, understanding how to approach situations that might create conflict, etc.

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And as I was just, you know, seeking things out, excuse me, in the spirit, a phrase came

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to me and I began to use that and that is called in the phrase was basically you need

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to own yourself.

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And it was partly because the Lord had been talking to me and teaching me about that and

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showing me ways in which I wasn't owning myself in my life and owning my decisions, or how

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I hadn't been doing it in the past, like, like before the Lord, Lord began walking me

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through my identity.

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And then he began, and then as, as he began to walk me in my identity, one of the things

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that I began to realize is, I had to take a, I had to be assertive about my own life,

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I had to be assertive, I had to take assertive action and approach to my, to my decisions,

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to having faith, etc.

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And then my whole life changed when I realized that I had to own who the Lord gave me.

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So he gave me myself first as the first basically, area of my kingdom, before he gave me other

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people before he gave meaning like a spouse or children, or, you know, to be responsible

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for and to love and to care for, you know, etc.

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The first thing that he holds me responsible for is myself, and everything is supposed

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to come from who he has declared and identified himself to be, and me to be particularly in

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relation because he is who he is, and he's created me from that and from who he is.

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So that's where this whole thing came out of.

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And I noticed that it began to majorly impact people.

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And I apologize, I haven't been getting messages all day and also getting messages on my, on

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my computer, I really do need to research how to dismiss those, or mark them as silent.

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Maybe, I don't know if I can do that or not.

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So I'm gonna have to research that.

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So I apologize.

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Okay.

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So first of all, we keep coming in of all times.

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Okay, so this is our last one on myself.

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And then over here, of course, we always talk about what it is that I personally struggled

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with that I felt might be something that that other people might resonate with.

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And so for me, it was kind of like this living life as the child servant, that I was always

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that I never had a right to, so to speak, grow up and take ownership of in charge of

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and finally be in the be the authority figure in my own life.

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And I kept what is that called?

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I kept pawning it off on other people.

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I kept thinking other people had that right.

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What happens is I'm giving up that right.

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That is what we do, by the way, with that the Bible talks about with like Satan, you

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know, in his in his kingdom is that we are we've become it we are voluntarily because

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God has has saved us.

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And you know, as Christians, we're now the new man.

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If ever we start acting like the old man, the Bible says, you know, that we're voluntarily

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re enslaving ourselves again to the law when we don't have to.

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So it's a voluntary thing that we're doing and we're doing it because it meaning like

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when we do that, we're giving up the authority of our own lives to someone else because that's

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what a slave is.

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It's where you no longer in control.

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And so it's this feeling of like this child servant, what we can do.

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And this is why I mentioned a servant is because we have a tendency to also use the word servant

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in our as as helping to define our relationship with the Lord that, well, I'm just a servant.

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I'm a servant of God.

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And yes, we are.

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And there's nothing wrong with that.

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Our problem is not seeing is a seeing ourselves as a servant first before understanding that

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no, we need to own ourselves first before we can voluntarily submit ourselves in servitude

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to God.

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That's what Jesus had to do.

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I have to realize that you have the right to submit it in order to be able to submit

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it.

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Because for instance, you cannot submit something that you don't own, that you don't control

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because then you don't have the authority to submit that thing.

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You know, it's not yours to give away.

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It's not yours to submit.

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It's not yours to do anything with because you don't own it.

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You have to own it first before you can follow through on what God has asked us to do, which

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is to submit yourself.

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You have to own you first, meaning that you have to realize that you have the authority

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in your own life to make your own free will decisions, which is a God given gift to you

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and that he doesn't violate.

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You have to realize that you have that.

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You have to claim that in order to be able to submit appropriate to the Lord and then

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be able to see yourself in a healthy way as a servant of God.

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Because you see yourself as a servant, but only after you can see yourself as a son.

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You see yourself as a servant before you see yourself as a son.

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God is very clear in scripture that that is the opposite way around and that you don't

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have a very healthy relationship with the father.

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It's seen in the prodigal son story where the prodigal son says, Hey, will you just

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allow me?

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And he said, you know, I know that if I go back to my father, that my, that his servants

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live better than I do outside of my father's house.

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So I, if I come back to my father, maybe he will be gracious enough to me to allow him

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to allow me to be a servant in his household.

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And the father said, no, that's not appropriate.

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That's not enough.

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That is not your place.

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Your place is as my son, then as my son, you will serve in my estate, which is what the,

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which is what the, um, uh, the older son did, but remember as well as what the old,

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the older son had the same problem as the prodigal son.

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He didn't see himself as a son.

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First, he saw himself as a servant, which is why he became resentful whenever the prodigal

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son came back and the father's giving him all of this stuff.

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The prodigal son chose to receive the cloak that the father gave him the, uh, the ring

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that the father gave him, the fatted calf and the party and all that.

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He chose to receive that while the older son was simply resentful and the, and the father

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approached him and said, you've never received the benefits of being in my estate.

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You just always served me.

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And so, because you've always seen yourself as a servant in relationship to me, even though

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you knew in your head that you were my son, you first approached me as my servant before

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being my son.

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And therefore you're now resentful when you see someone else taking advantage of what

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it is that I've given them and what I have identified them as, as being my son.

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And so I'm calling you to see yourself as my son first, in order to healthfully see

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yourself then afterwards, as a result, being someone who serves in who serves me in my

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kingdom.

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So there's nothing wrong with us seeing ourselves with the word servant, but it can

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only helpful.

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We can only healthfully see ourselves as that.

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If we see ourselves as sons first, otherwise seeing ourselves as like what I refer to here

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is, and this is just what I saw myself as.

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I felt like I was always a child to God and I was always a servant.

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So I was, I was always this child servant that didn't, that was always at his mercy.

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And that had no right to myself, including, I felt that I had no right to myself with

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other people as well, that they always, that, that I couldn't say no, that I didn't have

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the right to, that I didn't have the right to reject a request, which is something that

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we'll be talking about in a minute, et cetera.

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So anyway, this reminds, I found a, there's a passage in Jeremiah that reminded me of

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how I had always talked to the Lord when the Lord was urging me on into maturity.

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And I didn't recognize that that's what he was doing.

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My response was similar to Jeremiah, where he says, I do not know how to speak.

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I am only a child.

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Jeremiah one six.

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So at this time, at the beginning of Jeremiah, God is calling Jeremiah out.

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And he says, before I formed you in your mother's womb, I knew you and Jeremiah.

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And he's urging Jeremiah, Hey, look, this is the role that I have you to play.

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I have you to be a prophet.

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I have you to call, uh, to speak out my word to the people.

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And that's hard, but I'm going to make, I think it was Jeremiah and not, and not

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as equal that he said, I will make your forehead as, as, as hard as Flint so that

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no matter the opposition that comes against you, when you speak my word,

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you will be able to withstand.

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I will give you that strength.

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So he's calling Jeremiah out.

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But Jeremiah's first response was, how can I speak on your behalf?

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I'm only a child.

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Well, God's saying no.

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Oh, that's not who you are.

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You're inappropriately identifying yourself

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as a child in relationship to me,

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as a child in your progress to maturity.

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I am declaring you otherwise,

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and in order for you to step into that,

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you have to now see yourself differently.

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You have to identify yourself as I have identified you.

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So what does this, so if we don't do that,

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we cannot step into maturing as God wants us to,

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all of the, including gaining all of the benefits

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that God says that he gives us in his kingdom,

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that he gave the prodigal son

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when the prodigal son came back,

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and then he offered the older son,

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and he told the older son,

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you've never taken advantage of it.

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You've never received the benefits of being here,

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and now you're resentful,

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and you need to receive the benefits.

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You need to see yourself as I see you.

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You need to see yourself as my son first,

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and so that's what he calls us to do,

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and so if we're frustrated with our lives,

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if we're frustrated feeling we feel stuck,

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part of that comes from the fact

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that we're feeling that we don't own ourselves,

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and we go straight from not feeling that we own ourselves

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straight to submitting ourselves as a servant to the Lord,

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but you can't do that healthily

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until you realize that you have been identified

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as having your own, as being able to own yourself,

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having the authority over yourself, so to speak,

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and being able to make your own decisions

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before you can healthily then make the decision

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to submit yourself in servitude to the Lord,

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because the servitude is as a son servant,

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not as a slave servant,

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so I wanted to read a passage to you

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that you may have, before this journal,

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may have never even realized that you read in scripture,

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so remember that Jesus was our example

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of how we're to live our lives.

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Now, because even though he was God,

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it says in the Bible that he set aside his divinity,

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I think that was in Hebrews,

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but it said that he set aside his divinity and found it,

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oh, man, of course, I memorized it in King James,

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and I'm trying to remember it,

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but even if I do, it sounds so Shakespearean,

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it doesn't, and it's hard for us to relate to,

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but basically, it says that he found his equality

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with God to not be,

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oh, man, I don't remember the King James phrasing,

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and I definitely don't remember it

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in any other translation,

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because I grew up on King James,

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but anyway, the thing is that it's,

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I don't remember the exact phrasing,

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but basically, it was saying that even though he was divine,

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that he set aside his divinity,

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and operated out of his humanness

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that had a relationship with the Lord,

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so that he could be a true example to us

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of what it is that we can do as humans

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that are sons of God,

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not the same son of God that Jesus is,

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because of course, he's the first son of God,

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he is the firstborn, et cetera,

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he is the son of God with a capital S, capital M, right,

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or sorry, I was thinking son of man,

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capital S, capital G, right,

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and we're sons with a lowercase s,

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but still, we're sons as,

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and in the same way that Jesus was operating

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as a son of God when he was here on earth.

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Sorry, I think that there's a mosquito who's found me.

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So let's look at,

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in your, right below your session notes there,

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let's look at John 10, 17 to 18.

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The reason my father loves me

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is that I lay down my life only to take it up again.

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No one takes it from me,

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but I lay it down of my own accord,

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meaning his own will, his own choice,

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his own decision, his own intention.

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I have authority to lay it down

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and authority to take it up again.

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This command I received from my father.

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So I don't know if you knew that that's in scripture,

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but that's in scripture.

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And remember, Jesus was operating out of his humanness,

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meaning like his humanness that had been chosen by God

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to be his son.

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And he, of course, was found as a son of God, lowercase s,

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even though he also was the son of God, uppercase S, right,

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which allows us to then read scripture

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and see how he lived his life

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and know that that's an example,

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an example of his sonhood.

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act example of what we can expect. In fact, remember, Jesus said, not only will you do

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all the things that I've done, he said, you will do more than that. You will do more than

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what I've done on earth, you know, healing the sick, you know, et cetera, bringing heaven

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to earth. He said, you will do greater things than this. So not only was he an example to

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us, he said, you will even do greater things than this. So we know that this is that, that

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the way Jesus lived and how he interacted with the father, as far as like how he, um,

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how he submitted himself to the Lord, you know, everything, including took up his own,

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his, uh, his own right to himself, his own self will the authority that God gave him

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to operate out of that, that, you know, his own free will. And we know that that is what

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God calls us to do as well. God doesn't dictate to us what we have to do. He invites us to

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obey him. He invites us to agree with him. He invites us to align with what he said is

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true, but it's still our choice. So we are, we have to realize that God holds us responsible

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for the choices that we make. Are we going to come into alignment and agreement with

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him or are we not that we do have to realize that it's our own choice in order for it to

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be valid and to take effect and to have power in the kingdom of God. If you do what God

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tells you to do that, you don't feel that you, how do I pick that? You don't, you felt

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that you were made to, here's what I'm trying to say. If you did it and you didn't feel

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that you had a choice and that you were subject to him, you cannot receive all the benefits

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that God says that he gives his sons because you've chosen instead to come in as a servant.

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I have no choice, meaning like a slave. That's what I'm trying to say. You're coming in as

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a slave. I have no choice. I'm just here to serve kind of like the older son. I don't

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have a right to the benefits because you don't see yourself from that relationship. So even

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though there's such great benefits that God, that God offers to us, we have to take on

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the risk of being responsible for our own choices and to know sometimes we're going

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to make the right choice and sometimes we won't, but who's responsible us, not God.

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So what a lot of times we do, and this is what I used to, I used to do is, and I didn't

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realize that this is what I was doing, but because I didn't want to take responsibility

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for my life because I felt it was wrong. I felt that that was selfish or that that

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was a man centric and that, um, uh, that I was seeing myself as greater than the Lord,

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uh, that kind of thing. Then I just always thought, okay, I'm a nobody. And I just submit

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myself to the Lord as a nobody. And he is everybody. And therefore I don't, and I don't

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have a right to myself. Um, I just give myself up fully to the Lord and I'm him and I'm his

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to do with what he will. And God's just like, no, I don't want you to give yourself to me

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as if you're, as if you're nothing. And to, for me to do with you, I like a puppet or

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a robot, whatever it is that I will. I want us to do this together. I want us to have

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a relationship. I went to invite you into something and I want you to voluntarily of

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your own free will, you risking yourself on our relationship, just like I'm risking

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myself on our relationship. I want you to risk yourself on your relationship with me

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and follow me in whatever it is that I have declared is the truth. I want you to follow

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me in faith. I want you to risk yourself in believing that I am who I say that I am. And

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part of that is what I have said that you are. And, uh, and so it's, and so it's risky.

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And I didn't want to, for one thing, I thought it was wrong for another thing. I thought

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it was, you know, to think of, uh, to take that kind of responsibility for myself. And

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also I just thought it was, um, uh, I didn't want to be responsible if I made the wrong

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decision. I just wanted it to all be okay. Just because of like, well, God, I just thought

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at least I know for myself that I thought that that's what you wanted. So if it goes

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bad, it's God's fault because he told me to do that. And I was just, I was just subject

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to the circumstances because I was just being obedient as opposed to taking responsibility

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for my life and realizing and, and owning my, uh, owning my choices before God. And

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I will tell you, God loves people. God loves strong, strong

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decisions. God loves it when people make strong decisions. I've discovered this for myself.

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I was told that by someone and I was like, it's so interesting. This is an interesting

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phrasing. I didn't really know about that. And I don't really know why. And then I realized

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I was very, when they said it, I realized in practical moments and situations, how hard

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it is to make strong decisions, but I began to do it. And I was shocked at how much God

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loves that and how much God moves more in my life and moves situations and provides

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opportunities when I strongly make a decision for or against something or make a strong

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decision to act on an act on it or don't act on something, you know, depending on what

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the situation is. And, um, so in it's, and, uh, we can see this in scripture that God

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loves strong decisions by how he talked to the, to, uh, the church of, um, Laodicea.

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Oh my word. So I don't know if y'all can hear all of those dings. I hope not, but you probably

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can not had so many messages. Oh my goodness. They're just like out of nowhere, everyone

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realized, Oh, Ashley's recording. And so messages, because I'm getting him from like people who

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don't even, you know, connect with each other. So I'm getting it from random places, literally

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a rep from around the world. I'm like, what is the deal? Flag must've gone up on a pole

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somewhere above my house. Oh, contact Ashley now. Cause she's recording. Um, but anyway,

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um, and when he got talked to the church of Laodicea, he said, I wish that you were hot

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or cold because then I know what to do with you. He said, but I can't do anything with

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you. If you're lukewarm, all I can do is spit you out of my mouth. So we look at hot

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and we, and cold and we're thinking, well, surely there's only one choice that the Lord

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wants that wants us to make. He probably wants us to make the hot one and not the cold one

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is what at least the impression that I always got. So understand he would rather you make

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the cold one. Then to not make a decision or to be kind of like lukewarm in your decision,

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kind of like straddling the fence, kind of like, well, put one foot here and one foot

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here just in case this doesn't work out or just in case, you know, I'm really scared.

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I know God said to, I know that God said, this is the truth, but I'm going to keep one

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foot over here just in case I can, I need to pull myself back to safety because you

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know, God really wasn't faithful. Like he said, or God really wasn't good. Like what

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he said. In other words, what I had faith in really didn't work out, you know, or really

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don't like how it worked out, you know, or being lukewarm or just kind of, or just kind

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of a lot of times what we've what we find ourselves doing in that lukewarm state is

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what we refer to as waiting on the Lord. And waiting on the Lord is a great thing, but

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I don't think that we've understood what waiting on the Lord means. A lot of times we think

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that waiting on the Lord means that we're not supposed to do anything. And instead,

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waiting on the Lord is having faith that he's going to do what he said he will do. And we're

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just waiting for the manifestation, but we are expectant and we're waiting assertively.

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We're not waiting passively. And so the waiting passively is lukewarmness. That's actually

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not believing God. It's just, it's just waiting around, you know, where you've got no skin

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in the game, just seeing if God's going to do it, but emotionally you're not invested

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and you haven't risked yourself in faith that God will do it. And that God will be who he

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says he's going to be. Right. Anyway. So Jesus, again, looking at John 10, 17 to 18, the reason

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my father loves me is that I lay down my life only to take it up again. So he laid down

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his life first. He had to submit his life first. Then God gave it back to him, right?

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He told him, he said, I know now that I can trust you because you fully submitted yourself

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to me, even until death. Now I can give you power and authority because even though you

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had a right to it before, because you were my son and you were, uh, you were divine and

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she were signed with a lowercase S said, even though you had a right to the power and authority,

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you submitted what I had, what you submitted it to me completely. Now I know that I can

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give you all power and authority because all of the power and authority that I give you,

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you're always going to submit it completely to me. Now I can entrust you with it. Right.

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And so anyway, only to take that up again, no one takes my life from me. No one, not

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even the father, no one takes it from me, but I lay it down voluntarily of my own accord

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or you know, of my own choice of my own intention of my own free will. She, the Jesus was showing

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us an example here that even in relationship to his own life, you know, about like dying

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on the cross, you know, et cetera.

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it had to be Jesus's choice. He was submitted to the Lord, Lord, whatever I would rather your will

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over mine. I would rather this kept past for me, but Lord, you know, I would rather your will

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than mine. Right. And so he had submitted his will to the Lord, but when the Lord told him

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what he wanted, Jesus had to make the choice. It doesn't mean that, okay, well then I guess,

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whatever you say, Lord is just going to happen. Just like, okay, you know, Lord, God come,

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you know, father come take me. No, Jesus had to voluntarily give up his life. He had to

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give it, he had to put it on the altar, let it go, walk away and abandon it. That's how it feels.

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It feels like we're abandoning an aspect of ourselves. Right. But it says that I laid down

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my life of my own accord of my own choices. The only way that this works and you have to own it,

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you have to claim it. You have to know it's yours in order to know that you have the authority to

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make a choice for or against what God is saying. It's not going to just happen just because God

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said, and just because he wants you to do it, you're just like, okay, well, God, you know,

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if you want me to, well then I'll just do it. No, then that feels like a servant where you're just

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like, okay, well, I guess I have to, because God said, and if he doesn't, he's going to punish me.

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No, you have to make a free will to that. That won't count. What God wants to happen as a result

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of you submitting yourself won't happen if you're like, well, fine. You know? Okay. I guess I have

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to, or you do it scared. Like, oh my goodness. Okay. I'm not even going to look, but I'm just

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going to like, do it. That's not faith either. You have to, you have to own the decision that

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this is what I choose. Yes. I understand it's risk, but I choose God. I choose his will.

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And I choose to intentionally of my own free will step into and intentionally do what he

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tells me to do. You have to make it your choice. You can't do it because God said.

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You can do it. You can do it because God said, because that needs to initiate your choice,

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but it, the end, the last thing that's being done has to be your choice. Not because God said,

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because God said needs to initiate the motivation for your choice,

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but in order for it to be a sacrifice in order for it to be a submission, it has to be your choice.

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Not God said, hopefully that makes sense. That can initiate your motivation, but you're the one

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who has to be the last thing to touch it. This is my choice. This is what I'm doing out of my own

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free will. I'm not being forced. I'm not being coerced. I'm not obligated. If you feel that

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you're being obligated to do it, that's another word that I keep that, that, um, that explains

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what I'm trying to say. If you feel obligated when you're doing it, if you felt obligated to God,

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well, I have to, you know, then that's actually not owning yourself and owning your free choice

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because you feel an obligation owning yourself and doing something out of your own free will

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cannot have a sense of obligation. It can't. If it has a sense of obligation, that is slavery.

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That is thinking of yourself as a slave and offering yourself to God as a slave that you just,

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you're out of control of your own life and you have to, because God's forcing you like forcing

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you, like by pressuring you or saying that, will you know that acting as if you don't have a choice

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in the matter? Like, well, I've given myself up to God. So if he says I have to do that,

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then I have to do that. That's still a slave mentality. So anyway, that to, to put it in,

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in very layman's terms, that doesn't count. That's not submitting yourself to the Lord.

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That's not acting in faith. You're doing the thing, but it's not acting in faith. God wants

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more from us. He wants us to be, he wants us to own, but in order for us to, to, to submit

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ourselves in the way that God wants in order for us to come and collabor with him in the way that

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he wants, we have to own our free will first. Okay. Sorry. I thought, I thought it was somebody

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I'm supposed to be getting together with pretty soon, but it's not. Okay. So let me go to the next

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thing. Okay. Let's see here. Okay. So something that I keep talking about and mentioning is the

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word assertiveness. I mean that I keep the, how, the word that I am, that I can use to describe

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what it is that I'm talking about, about owning yourself is being assertive. That's another word

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that you can think of it as it's making it.

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said, it's being, taking proactive action and making a proactive approach towards something.

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So you need to choose to create your own life and choose it with intention.

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So you need to create your own life and approach it proactively, like emotionally, psychologically

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designing it, whatever. You need to do it with a purpose of creating it instead of letting it

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happen to you. In other words, your life and how you approach everything needs to be because this

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is how you're choosing to act. This is what you're choosing to believe. This is what you're choosing

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to do and to design and to how you're choosing to respond, et cetera, as opposed to letting

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your life and what it looks like be determined by how you're responding and how you're reacting

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to what happens. That's not owning your own life. So instead, so it's creating it proactively

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instead of being, excuse me, a victim to what happens to you. And instead of being a victim

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to your responses, to your reaction. In other words, well, this is what, these are the cards

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that have been dealt to me. And so the best that I can do is simply respond is come up with the,

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with the best responses that I can, the best reactions that I can. You won't feel like you

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own your life. And quite honestly, you won't be owning your life. You will have submitted it

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to in slavery, to the kingdom of the world, or, you know, in certain situations and to the Lord.

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And that's not how he wants us to come to him. He wants us to come to him as a son that instead of

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as a slave. So remember that you always, always, always, always, always, always, always without

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exception have choices and options always. So sometimes people will say things like, well,

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you don't understand in this situation here. I didn't have a choice. No, you did. You just

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didn't like that other choice. You just like really didn't like it where it didn't see,

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you didn't like it to such an extent that you're like, no, that making that other choice

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is not an option. So it just shows where your value system was, but it doesn't mean that it

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wasn't a choice. It's still an intentional choice. So that whole idea of, well, I didn't have a

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choice is a, is only comes from, from people that haven't owned themselves and decided, no,

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I'm going to take proactive. I'm going to make proactive decisions of what I want and how,

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and what, and how I want to live life with the Lord, how I want to, how I want to respond to

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what he initiates because remember God must always initiate everything. But I want to make a proactive

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decision about how I respond. I understand that we don't always like the series of choices that

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are presented to us, but we always have a choice. So you just make which one, which one fits in best

425
00:33:14.080 --> 00:33:22.640
with how you proactively want to approach your life. Right. And okay. So remember that what,

426
00:33:22.640 --> 00:33:28.000
what, how we've gotten to this place is when we were children, we felt very powerless, right?

427
00:33:28.000 --> 00:33:35.280
We were very dependent on things happening around, uh, on how things happened around us

428
00:33:35.280 --> 00:33:42.480
on other people. And because we were not in control, they were parents, other places,

429
00:33:42.480 --> 00:33:48.000
other people of authority, certain situations that we found ourselves in. We had to learn how to

430
00:33:48.800 --> 00:33:56.160
take, uh, how to be in power. Uh, how do I, how do I put that? We had to learn how to take up

431
00:33:56.960 --> 00:34:03.520
power, how to take up control. In other words, responsibility for ourselves that is learned.

432
00:34:04.560 --> 00:34:12.239
But the thing is that if we took, when we were developing our sense as, um, as, um, our, our,

433
00:34:13.600 --> 00:34:19.199
our sense of life, our perspective of life as children, and we just saw it as, oh, and we

434
00:34:19.199 --> 00:34:26.080
interpreted it, interpreted it as this means that I'm always out of control. And we thought that

435
00:34:26.080 --> 00:34:31.600
that's what life was telling us. In other words, that that's, that that's what our circumstances

436
00:34:31.600 --> 00:34:36.960
and how things worked out. We're telling us was simply, I'm always out of control as opposed to,

437
00:34:36.960 --> 00:34:42.239
no, this is just my time in life. If we took it as this means that I'm always out of my,

438
00:34:42.239 --> 00:34:46.639
out of control, we're going to take that into adulthood thinking. That's just how life is

439
00:34:47.199 --> 00:34:52.800
that I'm always out of control. I'm always at the mercy of what happens. I'm at the mercy of God.

440
00:34:52.800 --> 00:34:58.000
Like I was to my parents where I have to why, because they're bigger and badder and stronger

441
00:34:58.000 --> 00:34:59.760
or not badder, but you know, we can kind of play.

442
00:35:00.000 --> 00:35:03.860
like things like that, you know, just like, because we don't always want to do what they

443
00:35:03.860 --> 00:35:04.860
want us to do.

444
00:35:04.860 --> 00:35:05.860
Right.

445
00:35:05.860 --> 00:35:09.760
That they're just bigger than me and they're stronger than me and I just have to, and I'm

446
00:35:09.760 --> 00:35:10.760
just at their mercy.

447
00:35:10.760 --> 00:35:14.040
And then we can put that onto the Lord and think that that's how the Lord interacts with

448
00:35:14.040 --> 00:35:15.040
us.

449
00:35:15.040 --> 00:35:20.280
Even though we grow and mature with him and he, and he doesn't, he wants us to match his

450
00:35:20.280 --> 00:35:25.340
purpose in maturing us is to eventually be more.

451
00:35:25.340 --> 00:35:34.180
It's not that we're equal with him, but it's that we are oh, I just now remembered the

452
00:35:34.180 --> 00:35:35.180
phrase.

453
00:35:35.180 --> 00:35:42.220
It's that Jesus did not consider his equality with God to be, is something to be desired.

454
00:35:42.220 --> 00:35:47.140
That's how, that's how the King James phrase, the fact that he was giving up his divinity,

455
00:35:47.140 --> 00:35:49.340
which I think is a very fascinating way to phrase that.

456
00:35:49.340 --> 00:35:50.340
But there you go.

457
00:35:50.340 --> 00:35:51.340
King James for you.

458
00:35:52.340 --> 00:35:55.260
But it's not that we're exactly, it's not that we're equal with God.

459
00:35:55.260 --> 00:36:03.260
It's just that God wants us to have a relationship with him, where we have a contribution to

460
00:36:03.260 --> 00:36:10.340
him that he is blessed by and that gives to him and invest in him, just like he invests

461
00:36:10.340 --> 00:36:11.340
in us.

462
00:36:11.340 --> 00:36:17.380
And so he wants to mature us to the point where our, our character mirrors his character.

463
00:36:17.420 --> 00:36:22.740
And so in unity, there's back and forth, there's a two-way street.

464
00:36:22.740 --> 00:36:25.660
Now God always, always, always, always, always has the preeminence, right?

465
00:36:25.660 --> 00:36:31.820
But he's trying to mature us into bearing more weight at the table, at the table of

466
00:36:31.820 --> 00:36:37.660
co-counsel and discussion, you know, et cetera, of how do we Lord want to bring you and who

467
00:36:37.660 --> 00:36:41.940
it is that you and I are together and express that into the world.

468
00:36:41.940 --> 00:36:46.940
You know, we're going to have greater and greater weight in that.

469
00:36:47.500 --> 00:36:48.500
Let's see here.

470
00:36:48.500 --> 00:36:49.500
Okay.

471
00:36:49.500 --> 00:36:54.300
So we, as children, we always felt subject to others, right?

472
00:36:54.300 --> 00:36:56.740
And we can feel that in our relationship with the Lord.

473
00:36:56.740 --> 00:37:01.620
If we don't realize that our relationship, the Lord is meant to grow past that.

474
00:37:01.620 --> 00:37:03.500
It starts out like that.

475
00:37:03.500 --> 00:37:04.500
Sure.

476
00:37:04.500 --> 00:37:09.460
That God means for us to grow into just like we're supposed to as adults into owning ourselves

477
00:37:09.460 --> 00:37:13.820
more and to realize that we have a responsibility, not just, not just in front of God, but you

478
00:37:13.820 --> 00:37:18.420
know, with other people like our parents or other, other, I don't know, individuals

479
00:37:18.420 --> 00:37:21.620
that we interact with peers, et cetera.

480
00:37:21.620 --> 00:37:26.220
That we have a right to decide things for ourselves and how this will manifest that

481
00:37:26.220 --> 00:37:30.220
maybe we feel that we're not having responsibility for ourselves is things like, if we don't

482
00:37:30.220 --> 00:37:32.780
feel we can say no, right.

483
00:37:32.780 --> 00:37:38.620
To when, when people ask, when people make requests of us, et cetera.

484
00:37:38.620 --> 00:37:45.620
And so anyway, we can feel subject as well to the Lord, meaning that when we do that,

485
00:37:45.620 --> 00:37:49.660
we're not taking responsibility and then we're just bet and we can't therefore have true

486
00:37:49.660 --> 00:37:50.660
faith in God.

487
00:37:50.660 --> 00:37:51.660
Why?

488
00:37:51.660 --> 00:37:54.700
Because someone who's not, who doesn't have a responsibility of themselves can't make

489
00:37:54.700 --> 00:37:59.100
a choice because they don't feel like they have the right to make the choice.

490
00:37:59.100 --> 00:38:00.820
The choices are always made for them.

491
00:38:00.820 --> 00:38:05.420
God always chooses what I do and what I don't do, you know, as opposed to, no, you and God

492
00:38:05.420 --> 00:38:12.860
do this together, God's decision, you know, in God's, God's saying it weighs more than

493
00:38:12.860 --> 00:38:18.260
yours does in the discussion, but you do have a part in the discussion, right?

494
00:38:18.260 --> 00:38:21.900
You have to bring yourself to the table in order for God to have someone to have a relationship

495
00:38:21.900 --> 00:38:25.260
with and to work with, you can't have a relationship with the jellyfish.

496
00:38:25.260 --> 00:38:26.260
Okay.

497
00:38:26.260 --> 00:38:30.940
Meaning like somebody who has no background, who has no sense of self, who has not owned

498
00:38:31.940 --> 00:38:38.900
God gave you, you take you up, claim you so that you'll have something to give God so

499
00:38:38.900 --> 00:38:42.860
that you'll have something to interact with, with God.

500
00:38:42.860 --> 00:38:48.740
We can we can feel subject to the Lord and to just feel subject to whatever happens.

501
00:38:48.740 --> 00:38:49.740
Okay.

502
00:38:49.740 --> 00:38:54.460
Well, you know, I'm dependent on I'm out of control of my own life.

503
00:38:54.460 --> 00:38:57.580
I don't get to choose anything.

504
00:38:57.580 --> 00:39:02.980
And I can just like put in a wish list, like to a genie hoping that, you know, my parent,

505
00:39:02.980 --> 00:39:06.220
you know, as if you're three years old and just hoping that your parent will say, okay,

506
00:39:06.220 --> 00:39:10.460
you can go to Disney world or you can go to, you can go to the ice cream store.

507
00:39:10.460 --> 00:39:12.140
You can go, you're just hoping, right.

508
00:39:12.140 --> 00:39:13.140
And that's what we do with the Lord.

509
00:39:13.140 --> 00:39:15.940
We're just like, I'm going to throw it up like, Lord, please, please.

510
00:39:15.940 --> 00:39:19.980
You know, we, we interact with the world like a child and God wants to mature us past that.

511
00:39:19.980 --> 00:39:24.180
The only way you can do that is if you know, no longer interact with him as a child where

512
00:39:24.180 --> 00:39:26.500
he's the one doing everything.

513
00:39:26.500 --> 00:39:32.460
And then he's the one controlling your life, but rather take up responsibility for your

514
00:39:32.460 --> 00:39:37.340
own life, for what it will looks like, how you, how it's designed, what your future is,

515
00:39:37.340 --> 00:39:40.060
you know, et cetera.

516
00:39:40.060 --> 00:39:42.620
And as opposed to, oh, well, I'm just going to sit back.

517
00:39:42.620 --> 00:39:43.660
God has control of my life.

518
00:39:43.660 --> 00:39:44.660
I don't.

519
00:39:44.660 --> 00:39:45.980
So I'm just going to see what happens.

520
00:39:45.980 --> 00:39:47.540
I'm just going to see what he does.

521
00:39:47.540 --> 00:39:53.420
So when bad things happen, we blame God, well, God, you were in control, you know, and God's

522
00:39:53.580 --> 00:39:55.580
like, no, take responsibility.

523
00:39:55.580 --> 00:39:56.580
I gave it to you.

524
00:39:56.580 --> 00:40:00.020
What I'm doing with you is maturing you to teach you how.

525
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:01.800
how to take up the responsibility,

526
00:40:01.800 --> 00:40:06.800
how to maturely and kindly interact with creation

527
00:40:08.080 --> 00:40:10.880
and to design your life according to your character,

528
00:40:10.880 --> 00:40:12.960
which needs to be reflecting my character.

529
00:40:12.960 --> 00:40:14.920
And that's the maturing process, right?

530
00:40:16.200 --> 00:40:19.360
We can feel dependent on waiting for things to change

531
00:40:19.360 --> 00:40:24.360
instead of taking responsibility for proactively

532
00:40:25.200 --> 00:40:30.200
with the Lord and taking proactive action

533
00:40:31.520 --> 00:40:33.800
so that things can change.

534
00:40:33.800 --> 00:40:35.400
Now, again, we don't do this on our own.

535
00:40:35.400 --> 00:40:37.280
We do this in co-counsel with the Lord, et cetera.

536
00:40:37.280 --> 00:40:39.360
We'll be talking about that in just a second.

537
00:40:39.360 --> 00:40:43.840
But before I do, I wanted to mention that, oh, that's why.

538
00:40:46.680 --> 00:40:49.960
What we can do sometimes is we're waiting for things

539
00:40:49.960 --> 00:40:51.360
to get better on their own.

540
00:40:52.360 --> 00:40:54.480
We can develop that habit

541
00:40:54.480 --> 00:40:55.760
because that's what we did as a child.

542
00:40:55.760 --> 00:40:57.040
And we can do that in real life,

543
00:40:57.040 --> 00:41:00.680
not where we're just waiting for things to just get better.

544
00:41:00.680 --> 00:41:03.400
And we're standing by, not taking responsibility

545
00:41:03.400 --> 00:41:05.600
and just like, well, Lord, why aren't you changing it?

546
00:41:05.600 --> 00:41:06.520
Why aren't you fixing it?

547
00:41:06.520 --> 00:41:08.400
Why have you abandoned me?

548
00:41:08.400 --> 00:41:10.680
And God's just like, it's your life.

549
00:41:11.760 --> 00:41:13.960
He's like, yes, I do this with you.

550
00:41:13.960 --> 00:41:18.200
And I want you to submit the final decision to me,

551
00:41:18.200 --> 00:41:20.880
but dadgummit, take part in it.

552
00:41:21.320 --> 00:41:23.480
Come up with ideas, submit them to me.

553
00:41:23.480 --> 00:41:25.040
Let's talk about it.

554
00:41:25.040 --> 00:41:29.560
I'm not responsible for living your life for you.

555
00:41:29.560 --> 00:41:32.000
And then you just sit there like a bump on a log,

556
00:41:32.000 --> 00:41:34.320
just reacting to everything,

557
00:41:34.320 --> 00:41:37.560
and then blaming me for all the things you don't like.

558
00:41:37.560 --> 00:41:39.640
He's like, if you don't like it,

559
00:41:39.640 --> 00:41:43.600
take action and decide with me what we're going to create,

560
00:41:43.600 --> 00:41:45.440
what we're going to do.

561
00:41:45.440 --> 00:41:50.440
That's what God, that's part of the process that we're in,

562
00:41:50.440 --> 00:41:53.600
the development process is he's teaching us how to do that.

563
00:41:53.600 --> 00:41:55.360
It will not happen overnight.

564
00:41:55.360 --> 00:41:58.680
And it doesn't happen just overnight when you turn 18,

565
00:41:58.680 --> 00:42:01.400
you know, in the physical sense, you know, it just doesn't.

566
00:42:01.400 --> 00:42:05.280
Just because you're an adult in the physical sense

567
00:42:05.280 --> 00:42:08.680
doesn't mean that you're naturally an adult

568
00:42:08.680 --> 00:42:09.680
in the spiritual sense.

569
00:42:09.680 --> 00:42:13.160
God's going to teach you how to do that.

570
00:42:13.160 --> 00:42:15.280
So that's, that we need to realize

571
00:42:15.280 --> 00:42:16.360
that that's what's going on

572
00:42:16.360 --> 00:42:18.240
and submit ourselves to that process.

573
00:42:18.960 --> 00:42:22.360
And it's important for us to take initiative action.

574
00:42:22.360 --> 00:42:23.480
Initiative, by the way,

575
00:42:23.480 --> 00:42:27.200
does not mean initiative before God, before he does,

576
00:42:27.200 --> 00:42:29.080
because remember he needs to initiate everything.

577
00:42:29.080 --> 00:42:30.880
But a lot of times what he'll,

578
00:42:30.880 --> 00:42:33.640
the initiation will be some truth

579
00:42:33.640 --> 00:42:35.760
that he has spoken about you,

580
00:42:35.760 --> 00:42:39.160
about like the fact that, hey, you're good and you're holy

581
00:42:39.160 --> 00:42:41.280
and you're perfect beforehand, you know,

582
00:42:41.280 --> 00:42:44.600
and you are the king of your domain, you know, et cetera.

583
00:42:44.600 --> 00:42:48.120
These things that he said, that can be an initiation.

584
00:42:49.000 --> 00:42:50.600
And then as a response to that in faith, you're like,

585
00:42:50.600 --> 00:42:52.120
okay, God, I choose that that's me.

586
00:42:52.120 --> 00:42:55.600
So Lord from that, I choose also that that is the truth.

587
00:42:55.600 --> 00:42:57.160
So from that Lord,

588
00:42:57.160 --> 00:42:59.200
I think that this would be a really good idea.

589
00:42:59.200 --> 00:43:03.480
I think that this Lord exemplifies my character,

590
00:43:03.480 --> 00:43:06.680
which I believe exemplifies your character.

591
00:43:06.680 --> 00:43:09.480
I believe Lord that this isn't just something that I want.

592
00:43:09.480 --> 00:43:12.080
I believe that this is an aspect of you.

593
00:43:12.080 --> 00:43:13.600
What do you think?

594
00:43:13.600 --> 00:43:15.320
And you co-counsel with him and see

595
00:43:15.320 --> 00:43:17.800
if that's what y'all are supposed to do and carry it out.

596
00:43:17.800 --> 00:43:22.800
So, and I'm sorry, I was thinking about like moving into,

597
00:43:25.280 --> 00:43:27.120
use that as a segue to talk about the next thing.

598
00:43:27.120 --> 00:43:29.200
But before we do, I just want to mention

599
00:43:29.200 --> 00:43:33.760
that feeling subject to other people and to the Lord

600
00:43:33.760 --> 00:43:38.320
or to like, like I said, other people is a codependency.

601
00:43:38.320 --> 00:43:40.200
Because remember that codependency is always waiting

602
00:43:40.200 --> 00:43:42.640
for like outside conditions to be met

603
00:43:42.640 --> 00:43:44.280
in order for you to be okay.

604
00:43:45.160 --> 00:43:46.320
That's codependency.

605
00:43:46.320 --> 00:43:48.360
And you need to gain freedom for yourself.

606
00:43:48.360 --> 00:43:49.720
Like what we were talking about just the other day

607
00:43:49.720 --> 00:43:51.920
on the group chat, you need to take,

608
00:43:51.920 --> 00:43:55.520
you need to claim freedom for yourself first.

609
00:43:56.960 --> 00:44:01.280
And you be what make you meaning like your spirit,

610
00:44:01.280 --> 00:44:02.240
which is one with the Lord,

611
00:44:02.240 --> 00:44:04.320
not you just by yourself and your soul and your body,

612
00:44:04.320 --> 00:44:08.480
but you and your spirit need to be what makes you okay.

613
00:44:08.480 --> 00:44:12.080
Not what happens and how other people are interacting,

614
00:44:12.080 --> 00:44:14.320
how other people are behaving or whatever.

615
00:44:14.320 --> 00:44:19.320
So you need to always, so you need to be the reason

616
00:44:20.400 --> 00:44:23.800
and the Lord needs to be, you and the Lord together,

617
00:44:23.800 --> 00:44:26.120
your spirit in alignment with the Lord

618
00:44:26.120 --> 00:44:27.880
needs to be what makes you okay.

619
00:44:29.840 --> 00:44:34.120
And sorry, I was looking at my notes here.

620
00:44:37.040 --> 00:44:37.880
Okay.

621
00:44:38.760 --> 00:44:43.760
Yeah, not only to make you okay,

622
00:44:45.360 --> 00:44:50.360
but you need to be what initiates a change in your life

623
00:44:54.320 --> 00:44:58.800
as opposed to just waiting for something else to change

624
00:44:58.800 --> 00:45:00.160
in your circumstance.

625
00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:12.000
And that's what you need in order for your life to be changed, you need everything else to change, you need so and so to change your spouse to change you need your child to change, you need your circumstances to change in your finances to change

626
00:45:12.000 --> 00:45:24.000
in order for your life to change. No, you are the authority that everything else is listening to you need to initiate the change in order for something to change in your life.

627
00:45:25.000 --> 00:45:40.000
And we often, we often outsource that that's the word that I was like a while ago, we outsource that to God, because we feel helpless, we have, we have a learned helplessness in our life.

628
00:45:40.000 --> 00:45:49.000
And God says no, you're not helpless I've given you everything that you need. Pull, he says, for me from the Lord.

629
00:45:49.000 --> 00:45:50.000
Well for me.

630
00:45:50.000 --> 00:46:01.000
All right, so what life, are you choosing to create for yourself so here's a process of basically kind of like the steps that you can go through in order to begin creating things for your life.

631
00:46:01.000 --> 00:46:04.000
First of all, be intentional.

632
00:46:05.000 --> 00:46:14.000
You're going to have to make a choice you're going to have to make a decision, be intentional, this is, this is a reality, this is who God says that he is and who says that I am.

633
00:46:14.000 --> 00:46:24.000
And from that place. This is what I am, this is how I'm going to live. You may not have the exact thing of like how you're going to live but that I'm going to live proactively.

634
00:46:24.000 --> 00:46:29.000
I own my life. We're going to talk about some examples in which you can practice owning your life.

635
00:46:29.000 --> 00:46:31.000
So be intentional.

636
00:46:31.000 --> 00:46:35.000
Then, create and design it.

637
00:46:35.000 --> 00:46:37.000
Dream.

638
00:46:37.000 --> 00:46:48.000
Notice and discern the things in your conversations with the Lord, what rises up in your spirit where you feel life, where you feel excitement where you feel passion.

639
00:46:49.000 --> 00:47:07.000
And then, and then you present those things to the Lord and co counsel. Now with the smaller things you just kind of like king them off of your spirit and, and just in see if you sense this, a sense of like freedom and openness, or if you feel like a closeness

640
00:47:08.000 --> 00:47:21.000
And by smaller things I'm talking about something like you thought you were going to do one thing today with your schedule and then you thought well I don't know maybe I'd actually like to go into town and do some shopping.

641
00:47:21.000 --> 00:47:31.000
You know, I was going to do all of these things, but maybe I'd like, maybe I need to go, you know, shop, maybe you haven't shopped for winter clothes in a while and you know that you need to.

642
00:47:32.000 --> 00:47:49.000
So you're like, you know, that just feels like fun today. So I had all these other things on my schedule to get done. But this other thing I feel life on it I feel like that stepping into honoring and and appreciating who God made me to be and I'm just going to be enjoying myself I'm going to be.

643
00:47:49.000 --> 00:47:58.000
I'm going to be actively stepping out on my faith in God and who he says that I am by, by enjoying myself today.

644
00:47:58.000 --> 00:48:02.000
So I was going to get all these things, you know, checked off on my list.

645
00:48:02.000 --> 00:48:14.000
You know, and then you see, okay, well, I can just kind of ping that off of my spirit, or, you know, I don't know, should I do that because I won't be doing all of these other things I'd be doing this instead.

646
00:48:14.000 --> 00:48:22.000
Do I feel an openness and a freedom do I feel like my spirit rising up within me that yes it's good to do today is that's a good choice to make.

647
00:48:23.000 --> 00:48:33.000
Do you feel life on it is another way to phrase it, or do you feel like a closeness from the Lord not from your flesh not from fear but from the Lord of like no, it's just not the wisest thing to do today.

648
00:48:33.000 --> 00:48:44.000
That's great that you want to do that, but enjoy love and honor yourself in while you're doing these other things, you know, and so that's what I mean by like a smaller thing.

649
00:48:44.000 --> 00:48:55.000
With the bigger things it's important to be very deliberate with the Lord of like, okay, or we're gonna spend some time in prayer. I'm going to, you know, seek you Lord really intentionally.

650
00:48:55.000 --> 00:49:06.000
I'm asking Lord you know what should we do about should I take this job. Should I, and I don't know should we change churches should we you know like the bigger things like that.

651
00:49:07.000 --> 00:49:22.000
What I'm saying though is that it's that normally with the smaller things we can get overwhelmed and we think funny to stop and deliberate and just like okay Lord, what should I do, you can just ask remember this, this relationship with the Lord needs to be.

652
00:49:23.000 --> 00:49:42.000
You need to see this as a way of life that he's with you he's not a genie or or a someone, you need to be very afraid of, and like check and make sure he's okay with it, you know, so you don't get punished, you know, it just, this is someone you're

653
00:49:43.000 --> 00:49:56.000
doing life with even more closely than you're doing life with your spouse, treat it like that, making part of you, not part of your life, making part of you.

654
00:49:56.000 --> 00:49:59.000
The only way you can have a healthy relationship with yourself.

655
00:50:00.000 --> 00:50:07.120
But is part of you, meaning like, uh, meaning like he's not separate from you.

656
00:50:09.480 --> 00:50:11.960
Um, because you remember you're unified with him, right.

657
00:50:12.660 --> 00:50:14.260
Um, okay.

658
00:50:14.580 --> 00:50:19.260
And then the last, was there something else that's going to say, Oh yeah.

659
00:50:19.500 --> 00:50:22.860
And then you, and then you, of course, from that co-counseling with the Lord,

660
00:50:22.940 --> 00:50:24.060
you make a strong decision.

661
00:50:24.060 --> 00:50:24.980
That's very important.

662
00:50:25.620 --> 00:50:26.520
Make it strong.

663
00:50:27.400 --> 00:50:28.660
Don't be wishy-washy about it.

664
00:50:28.880 --> 00:50:29.180
Okay.

665
00:50:29.180 --> 00:50:30.940
I'm going to do this and I hope it's okay.

666
00:50:30.940 --> 00:50:31.780
I think it's okay.

667
00:50:32.460 --> 00:50:36.420
You make a decision about what you think about, about, if you think that it's

668
00:50:36.420 --> 00:50:39.740
front, that it's reflective of the character of the Lord and that he's okay

669
00:50:39.740 --> 00:50:49.420
with it, then decide and act on it by faith, meaning like that you're choosing.

670
00:50:49.620 --> 00:50:54.880
You believe that this really is God that is giving you permission, openness,

671
00:50:54.880 --> 00:50:58.400
freedom, that this is the direction that his character that he's

672
00:50:58.400 --> 00:51:00.480
revealed to you this far is in.

673
00:51:00.680 --> 00:51:02.120
It's in you doing this.

674
00:51:02.160 --> 00:51:03.640
It's in you living like this.

675
00:51:03.640 --> 00:51:08.240
It's in you, you know, may as if you it's in you enjoying yourself and going

676
00:51:08.240 --> 00:51:11.760
shopping for some winter clothes, you know, because, you know, because

677
00:51:11.760 --> 00:51:12.920
you've been needing to or whatever.

678
00:51:13.440 --> 00:51:18.880
It's make, make a very strong decision so that you are, so that you allow

679
00:51:18.880 --> 00:51:23.080
yourself to be accountable to God for having made that decision.

680
00:51:24.080 --> 00:51:29.320
Not holding God accountable for the decision that you made, because that is

681
00:51:29.320 --> 00:51:32.720
doing what Adam did with Eve, where he said, well, you, this is the woman you

682
00:51:32.720 --> 00:51:35.440
gave me, don't go to God.

683
00:51:35.640 --> 00:51:39.000
If he gets onto you later and says, well, you know, and says, Hey, look, you

684
00:51:39.000 --> 00:51:43.080
know, child, that, that really, you know, wasn't my, you know, my character.

685
00:51:43.240 --> 00:51:45.120
Just take that as a learning experience.

686
00:51:45.120 --> 00:51:48.040
Like, okay, God's just showing me this isn't him.

687
00:51:48.040 --> 00:51:51.760
So I'm trying to just, just kind of find him and try to learn where he is and

688
00:51:52.040 --> 00:51:55.720
try to learn and discern, you know, what's, what's from the spirit and

689
00:51:55.720 --> 00:51:57.400
what's from my flesh, you know, et cetera.

690
00:51:57.600 --> 00:51:59.320
It's a learning experience.

691
00:51:59.320 --> 00:52:00.720
So take it like that.

692
00:52:01.200 --> 00:52:07.360
Don't, um, instead of taking it like, well, God, you know, but you told me,

693
00:52:07.360 --> 00:52:12.520
or I thought you told me or I, whatever you hear all of that defensiveness.

694
00:52:12.880 --> 00:52:16.320
That is the same thing that Adam did when the Lord, you know, approached him and

695
00:52:16.320 --> 00:52:18.120
he said, who told you you were naked?

696
00:52:18.360 --> 00:52:21.120
And he said, well, it's the woman that you gave to me.

697
00:52:21.120 --> 00:52:22.880
She's the one who ate the fruit.

698
00:52:23.080 --> 00:52:26.920
And she said, it's, it's that defensiveness.

699
00:52:26.920 --> 00:52:31.080
Only what we'll do is just like Adam is we'll turn it onto the Lord.

700
00:52:31.240 --> 00:52:33.560
Lord, you, you put me in this position.

701
00:52:33.800 --> 00:52:37.320
I just thought I was doing the right thing, you know, or you gave me this

702
00:52:37.320 --> 00:52:40.400
woman and I thought, because it came from you that anything that came from

703
00:52:40.400 --> 00:52:42.720
now was okay, you know, and yeah.

704
00:52:43.040 --> 00:52:45.520
And so you have to make a strong decision.

705
00:52:45.520 --> 00:52:49.320
And if God corrects you, you know, and you realize, oh, well, apparently

706
00:52:49.800 --> 00:52:54.080
wasn't where the Lord was today or how he was talking to me or, and he was,

707
00:52:54.120 --> 00:52:58.200
he's just simply teaching you how to discern who he is and where he is and

708
00:52:58.200 --> 00:53:02.360
what his character is and allow yourself to be held accountable by the Lord.

709
00:53:03.120 --> 00:53:08.560
For your decision, you will move much quicker through life, through that,

710
00:53:08.600 --> 00:53:14.640
that maturing process, if you are bold about making strong

711
00:53:14.640 --> 00:53:18.280
decisions and you own a mistake.

712
00:53:19.160 --> 00:53:24.320
If you own, not knowing something, you will move faster.

713
00:53:24.360 --> 00:53:28.240
It is shocking how much faster you will move.

714
00:53:28.240 --> 00:53:32.080
Then if you try to not make decisions or try to make sure that they're

715
00:53:32.080 --> 00:53:37.080
absolutely perfect before you make them, you will, I can tell you from

716
00:53:37.080 --> 00:53:40.080
personal experience that one is a mix.

717
00:53:40.360 --> 00:53:40.960
Oh my word.

718
00:53:40.960 --> 00:53:42.080
I don't even know it.

719
00:53:42.080 --> 00:53:46.600
You will move through life at least 10 times slower at least.

720
00:53:46.880 --> 00:53:48.240
And it's probably more than that.

721
00:53:48.760 --> 00:53:51.560
And your life will be in the Lord will.

722
00:53:51.600 --> 00:53:55.200
And honestly, physically as well, you know, physical experiences and

723
00:53:55.200 --> 00:53:57.840
whatever, it will speed up at least.

724
00:53:58.400 --> 00:54:02.920
No joke, at least 10 times more and at least 10 times faster.

725
00:54:03.120 --> 00:54:07.520
If you make strong decisions and allow yourself to make mistakes and to be

726
00:54:07.520 --> 00:54:12.080
held accountable by the Lord for the fact that that was you and your choice

727
00:54:12.120 --> 00:54:14.040
and your free will that made that decision.

728
00:54:15.040 --> 00:54:15.560
Very strong.

729
00:54:16.120 --> 00:54:21.760
So, um, uh, anyway, um, let's see here.

730
00:54:21.800 --> 00:54:26.120
What is the next thing here?

731
00:54:26.240 --> 00:54:30.400
Um, okay.

732
00:54:30.680 --> 00:54:32.240
Um, Oh, wow.

733
00:54:32.360 --> 00:54:35.000
That's an interesting place that I put that note.

734
00:54:35.000 --> 00:54:36.200
Let me move that really quick.

735
00:54:36.400 --> 00:54:37.920
Cause that's not a good time to talk about that.

736
00:54:38.480 --> 00:54:39.520
It'd be so confusing.

737
00:54:40.680 --> 00:54:44.160
Um, it's not letting me touch it.

738
00:54:44.400 --> 00:54:44.960
Oh, there we go.

739
00:54:44.960 --> 00:54:45.600
Okay.

740
00:54:46.320 --> 00:54:48.160
So let's move that really fast.

741
00:54:49.240 --> 00:54:50.840
Where are we going to put that one?

742
00:54:51.280 --> 00:54:52.480
I'm going to put that one down here.

743
00:54:52.480 --> 00:54:55.040
When we talk about saying no.

744
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:08.680
Okay, sorry about this, but this will help us make this, and it'll make a lot more sense

745
00:55:08.680 --> 00:55:11.440
if I put that down there.

746
00:55:11.440 --> 00:55:18.560
Here we go, okay, okay that that's helpful.

747
00:55:18.560 --> 00:55:27.280
All right, um, strong decisions, um, okay so also about dreams you know you're dreaming

748
00:55:27.280 --> 00:55:28.760
or desiring things etc.

749
00:55:28.760 --> 00:55:36.400
I wanted to mention that, um, okay so people that don't dream, let me just read it out

750
00:55:36.400 --> 00:55:42.240
how I wrote it, people that don't dream, don't pursue their dreams, or do nice caring loving

751
00:55:42.240 --> 00:55:47.960
things proactively for themselves, not as an escape, because a lot of times we do self

752
00:55:47.960 --> 00:55:55.920
care things as an escape, no, if you do not dream pursue dreams or do nice caring loving

753
00:55:55.920 --> 00:56:01.040
things proactively for yourself, not as a defense of like well I'm just tired and so

754
00:56:01.040 --> 00:56:04.560
I need to regroup proactively for yourself.

755
00:56:04.560 --> 00:56:09.840
If you don't, you don't like yourself.

756
00:56:09.840 --> 00:56:15.440
People who don't do those things don't like this, that it we're not trying to not like

757
00:56:15.440 --> 00:56:19.040
ourselves we don't realize that that's what I'm what we're doing but I promise you that

758
00:56:19.040 --> 00:56:21.140
is exactly what we're doing.

759
00:56:21.140 --> 00:56:23.100
If you're not pursuing your dreams.

760
00:56:23.100 --> 00:56:27.980
If you're not just dreaming, and if you're not doing nice caring loving things proactively

761
00:56:27.980 --> 00:56:31.420
for yourself, then you don't like yourself.

762
00:56:31.420 --> 00:56:36.380
You need to change that you are something that God wants you to spend time on that God

763
00:56:36.380 --> 00:56:38.980
wants you to honor.

764
00:56:38.980 --> 00:56:43.700
You have no hope of appropriately honoring someone else, unless you honor the first thing

765
00:56:43.700 --> 00:56:47.340
that God gave you, and it holds you responsible for.

766
00:56:47.340 --> 00:56:51.340
So your decision making process needs to depend on you and the life that you want to

767
00:56:51.340 --> 00:56:58.500
create and how, and, and it not it needs to not be created based on others needs or requests

768
00:56:58.500 --> 00:57:00.620
that they make of you.

769
00:57:00.620 --> 00:57:02.980
Now, you need to choose.

770
00:57:02.980 --> 00:57:08.580
This is a really big one, you need to to in making choices, but we're going to talk about

771
00:57:08.580 --> 00:57:13.300
now is talking about the difference between yes and no.

772
00:57:14.300 --> 00:57:20.780
And like when you want to say, like, how to say yes and how to say no and own your decisions

773
00:57:20.780 --> 00:57:21.860
when you do that.

774
00:57:21.860 --> 00:57:30.460
So first of all, realize that you need to choose God, others, and yourself over the

775
00:57:30.460 --> 00:57:31.460
outcome.

776
00:57:31.460 --> 00:57:36.060
Remember that we've been talking about that, you know, this whole time about about outcomes,

777
00:57:36.060 --> 00:57:42.140
and how we need to like let go of that outcome, right, you always need to choose God, others,

778
00:57:42.140 --> 00:57:46.540
or yourself over what could happen over the outcome.

779
00:57:46.540 --> 00:57:49.620
And that includes and we're and we're used to things about like, a lot of times we're

780
00:57:49.620 --> 00:57:51.660
used to choosing others over the outcome.

781
00:57:51.660 --> 00:57:55.780
What's very important is we can't choose others over the outcome until we've chosen God and

782
00:57:55.780 --> 00:57:59.460
ourselves over the outcome.

783
00:57:59.460 --> 00:58:08.180
Okay, so first of all, in saying yes, so remember that, that, that, wow, there's all kinds of

784
00:58:08.180 --> 00:58:13.220
like wasps around here today.

785
00:58:13.220 --> 00:58:15.980
That we wonder, you know, what to say yes to and what to say no to.

786
00:58:15.980 --> 00:58:21.260
So remember that when you say yes to something that is a commitment to which you're intentionally

787
00:58:21.260 --> 00:58:24.700
offering yourself.

788
00:58:24.700 --> 00:58:29.860
It's more than you're offering your time or your possessions or your money, you are offering

789
00:58:29.860 --> 00:58:35.620
you, there's an aspect of you that's in it that's in your time, that time belongs to

790
00:58:35.620 --> 00:58:39.220
you, your money, that money belongs to you, you're supposed to be a steward of that, you're

791
00:58:39.220 --> 00:58:40.940
responsible for that, right?

792
00:58:40.940 --> 00:58:44.700
So just remember that every commitment that you make, everything that you say yes to is

793
00:58:44.700 --> 00:58:52.860
you committing an aspect of a piece of a piece of yourself, you're going to be investing

794
00:58:52.860 --> 00:58:57.320
it, you're going to be pouring into it, because you're going to be giving it a part of yourself.

795
00:58:57.320 --> 00:58:59.040
It's that serious, right?

796
00:58:59.040 --> 00:59:04.020
So you need to own you in order to appropriately be able to say yes to things and it needs

797
00:59:04.020 --> 00:59:11.460
to be and you need to be kind to yourself and hold proper boundaries, so to speak.

798
00:59:11.460 --> 00:59:17.260
So that you're only giving what's appropriate to give of yourself.

799
00:59:17.260 --> 00:59:21.180
So when you say yes, it needs to be an assertive decision based on the life that you want to

800
00:59:21.180 --> 00:59:28.220
create based on what you want your life to be and look like and who you want to be, etc.

801
00:59:28.220 --> 00:59:33.620
So even if it's a response to a request, so what I mean is just is if someone makes a

802
00:59:33.620 --> 00:59:36.820
request, well, this isn't something that you probably designed in your mind of like

803
00:59:36.820 --> 00:59:42.620
the life that you wanted to create for yourself of doing this thing, but someone has come

804
00:59:42.620 --> 00:59:52.780
to you and you now have a response, a reaction, right, that your response and your reaction,

805
00:59:52.780 --> 00:59:58.060
you need to own the decision of how you're going to respond, you don't allow yourself

806
00:59:58.060 --> 01:00:00.020
to just respond based off of what you want.

807
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:01.140
Want to avoid happening.

808
01:00:01.140 --> 01:00:08.140
No, what you say yes to in that request needs to be because that is a decision

809
01:00:08.140 --> 01:00:13.320
that you have made of what you want to do and what you want to give yourself

810
01:00:13.420 --> 01:00:21.720
to not something about not, not, not just your time, you too, that you want

811
01:00:21.720 --> 01:00:24.520
to pour into, you know, et cetera.

812
01:00:24.720 --> 01:00:29.200
It needs to be, it, it, it's that kind of a, of a serious thing.

813
01:00:29.200 --> 01:00:32.440
And it needs to fall in line with who it is that you are and what kind of a life

814
01:00:32.740 --> 01:00:35.680
that you've designed and decided that you wanted to have.

815
01:00:35.700 --> 01:00:40.440
Now, I don't mean that all of this meat, that, that every request that people

816
01:00:40.440 --> 01:00:41.860
makes is something that just sounds.

817
01:00:42.400 --> 01:00:45.120
And that we say yes to is something that sounds fun.

818
01:00:45.480 --> 01:00:48.660
It doesn't always sound fun, but it needs to be something that you decide.

819
01:00:48.660 --> 01:00:51.280
No, I can choose what I want to with my time.

820
01:00:51.320 --> 01:00:52.520
I'm not obligated.

821
01:00:52.800 --> 01:00:53.960
I am free.

822
01:00:54.200 --> 01:00:56.280
I'm not enslaved by an obligation on my word.

823
01:00:56.280 --> 01:00:59.040
I have to know you have to own yourself.

824
01:00:59.080 --> 01:01:05.720
And decide, okay, do I want to, is that something that I want to choose to do?

825
01:01:05.960 --> 01:01:09.080
It may not be something that's fun, but what does it mean?

826
01:01:09.080 --> 01:01:11.040
What is it going to mean for that other person?

827
01:01:11.240 --> 01:01:15.000
If you, if you do that request, is it going to make them feel loved?

828
01:01:15.000 --> 01:01:18.480
Is it going to make him feel appreciated in some like very significant way?

829
01:01:18.720 --> 01:01:22.760
Is it going to be some way that you can just, just help them out and you want to

830
01:01:22.760 --> 01:01:28.440
be the, the person that, that would help in this kind of situation and this, is

831
01:01:28.440 --> 01:01:33.400
it actually a time where it's actually helpful to you, you know, to do, I mean,

832
01:01:33.400 --> 01:01:35.280
meaning like it's an appropriate time for you.

833
01:01:36.120 --> 01:01:39.160
Um, and if so, you make that decision.

834
01:01:39.160 --> 01:01:41.520
No, this is what I want to do for with my life.

835
01:01:42.440 --> 01:01:45.000
I am going to intentionally do this thing.

836
01:01:45.000 --> 01:01:48.880
It may not be fun, but there's all kinds of things that we intentionally do because

837
01:01:48.880 --> 01:01:51.480
it's the kind of life that we want to create, but we don't just love the thing

838
01:01:51.480 --> 01:01:53.000
that we're doing, like brushing our teeth.

839
01:01:53.320 --> 01:01:56.160
I mean, seriously, how many people look forward all day to brushing your teeth?

840
01:01:56.200 --> 01:01:58.000
No, but you just do it.

841
01:01:58.000 --> 01:01:58.240
Why?

842
01:01:58.240 --> 01:02:01.120
Because it helps you create the type of life that you want.

843
01:02:01.400 --> 01:02:02.280
That's what I'm talking about.

844
01:02:02.480 --> 01:02:06.080
Building community, investing in relationships, et cetera.

845
01:02:06.360 --> 01:02:10.040
So, and you don't say yes to all of them, but you say yes, very

846
01:02:10.040 --> 01:02:12.440
intentionally to some of them.

847
01:02:12.840 --> 01:02:18.240
You're the, it needs saying yes, needs to be intentional, not a reactive

848
01:02:18.240 --> 01:02:20.000
response out of obligation.

849
01:02:20.000 --> 01:02:20.320
Right.

850
01:02:21.120 --> 01:02:26.480
Um, and remember that your love cannot be created by the needs of others.

851
01:02:27.480 --> 01:02:29.760
So remember, love your neighbor as yourself.

852
01:02:29.800 --> 01:02:33.240
Your love for you is the standard of loving others.

853
01:02:33.680 --> 01:02:35.000
So own yourself.

854
01:02:35.160 --> 01:02:37.880
So you have yourself to give to others.

855
01:02:38.960 --> 01:02:44.200
Um, just you choose to love someone.

856
01:02:44.920 --> 01:02:49.480
Don't make yourself love someone because they need something

857
01:02:49.960 --> 01:02:51.560
because they, they need whatever.

858
01:02:51.600 --> 01:02:55.600
No proactively choose to love other people.

859
01:02:56.840 --> 01:02:59.760
Um, and you, and do that from your spirit.

860
01:02:59.760 --> 01:03:01.560
That's how you'll be able to love the unlovable.

861
01:03:01.920 --> 01:03:05.640
That's something that I wanted to mention because so often we feel that we have to.

862
01:03:08.360 --> 01:03:13.400
That we'll try to create a fake love for someone else because we

863
01:03:13.400 --> 01:03:16.080
feel obligated to love someone.

864
01:03:16.880 --> 01:03:17.760
You know, we feel obligated.

865
01:03:17.760 --> 01:03:22.400
Well, God tells us to, if we feel an obligation to, it's not real love anyway.

866
01:03:22.400 --> 01:03:23.560
So just, just forget it.

867
01:03:23.560 --> 01:03:23.840
Right.

868
01:03:24.560 --> 01:03:29.800
But you will automatically, naturally, effortlessly already

869
01:03:29.800 --> 01:03:31.320
love that person in your spirit.

870
01:03:31.320 --> 01:03:35.400
So if you want to love someone, shift into the spirit and see them as God sees them.

871
01:03:35.880 --> 01:03:37.200
Then you will be loving them.

872
01:03:37.200 --> 01:03:39.840
Don't try to love them out of your flesh.

873
01:03:40.720 --> 01:03:46.040
Um, just because they need to be loved just because you see a need, because

874
01:03:46.040 --> 01:03:49.560
you will get burned out if you do things out of obligation, including

875
01:03:49.560 --> 01:03:52.400
try to love someone or try to make yourself love someone, you know?

876
01:03:53.400 --> 01:03:53.720
Okay.

877
01:03:53.720 --> 01:03:54.880
So saying no.

878
01:03:55.080 --> 01:04:00.800
So people, um, uh, can believe that they don't have a right to be able to say no.

879
01:04:00.840 --> 01:04:04.200
And you've got to understand you do have a right because you own yourself

880
01:04:04.240 --> 01:04:05.720
and what it is that you commit to.

881
01:04:06.560 --> 01:04:12.560
Um, and even if it's a response, like I said to a request, um, now I'm not going

882
01:04:12.560 --> 01:04:15.880
to talk as much about this one, but I do want to mention that people can get

883
01:04:15.880 --> 01:04:18.600
sick when violating their own boundaries.

884
01:04:19.120 --> 01:04:21.080
They literally can get physically sick.

885
01:04:21.440 --> 01:04:23.160
They can develop auto-immune diseases.

886
01:04:23.160 --> 01:04:24.960
They can develop anxiety.

887
01:04:24.960 --> 01:04:28.720
They can develop chronic stress, et cetera, because they're

888
01:04:28.960 --> 01:04:30.200
violating their own boundaries.

889
01:04:30.200 --> 01:04:34.680
They feel controlled by and subject to other people's requests.

890
01:04:34.960 --> 01:04:37.320
You have got to take that power back.

891
01:04:37.360 --> 01:04:39.760
Meaning like you have to take it.

892
01:04:39.760 --> 01:04:44.280
You have to claim yourself again, and it might look messy for a while.

893
01:04:45.080 --> 01:04:45.400
Right.

894
01:04:45.880 --> 01:04:49.840
And when you, um, in, in trying to, in trying to do that, you might feel me.

895
01:04:50.440 --> 01:04:54.280
Don't do it from a mean place, you know, and just like trying to protect yourself.

896
01:04:54.280 --> 01:04:57.520
You don't need to protect yourself, choose yourself.

897
01:04:57.840 --> 01:05:00.000
And when you choose yourself, you will find that you will do.

898
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:07.360
more loving, caring things than you did before. And people also have more respect for you.

899
01:05:07.360 --> 01:05:11.840
So remember that people can, that you can get sick when violating your own boundaries, not

900
01:05:11.840 --> 01:05:17.120
necessarily just doing it one time, but if you consistently live that life, because your soul

901
01:05:17.120 --> 01:05:21.680
feels abandoned and your body then takes that instruction and belief and tries to protect

902
01:05:21.680 --> 01:05:26.880
itself. And it feels that it is subject to and vulnerable to all the things that are coming

903
01:05:26.880 --> 01:05:33.440
against it. Right. Okay. And so authenticity, remember that it's important when you're owning

904
01:05:33.440 --> 01:05:41.280
yourself to be very authentic, to, to know who it is that you really are you, who you really

905
01:05:41.280 --> 01:05:45.200
are. Remember we talked about that last time, getting to know who you really are. It's important

906
01:05:45.200 --> 01:05:50.480
to be authentic, meaning that it's that authenticity is honesty with vulnerability.

907
01:05:51.440 --> 01:05:58.960
You can't honesty without vulnerability is not authentic. You can only be authentic. If you're

908
01:05:58.960 --> 01:06:05.440
being honest with vulnerability and being vulnerable at the same time. So if y'all have

909
01:06:05.440 --> 01:06:09.760
questions about this, you know, y'all can ask me. And remember that we were just talking about

910
01:06:09.760 --> 01:06:14.320
personality tests, like the desk. Remember that personality tests reveal what a person believes

911
01:06:14.320 --> 01:06:19.440
to be true about themselves and who they believe themselves to be not who they really are.

912
01:06:19.440 --> 01:06:24.400
So I, I just, you know, hold things like the desk, you know, the grain of salt, it,

913
01:06:24.400 --> 01:06:30.800
it gives us an idea about how people act based off of who they think they are. Right. But it

914
01:06:30.800 --> 01:06:37.120
doesn't mean that, that, that, that does not identify who we really are. Remember what that

915
01:06:37.120 --> 01:06:42.480
guy said about me, you know, that my desk profile showed so opposite of how I interacted with people.

916
01:06:42.480 --> 01:06:48.240
And he said, because that shows how she submitted that she is, you know, to the Lord it's because

917
01:06:48.240 --> 01:06:55.200
I had learned that, Hey, just because this is how, uh, that, that, that the D and that C in me,

918
01:06:55.200 --> 01:07:01.120
you know, that, that dominating, that dominating personality that I, that I had a tendency toward

919
01:07:01.120 --> 01:07:07.840
was based off of who I thought that I was. Right. Um, and, uh, and there's still an aspect in which

920
01:07:07.840 --> 01:07:12.880
that actually is how the Lord made me that there is an aspect in which it was, it was who I thought

921
01:07:12.880 --> 01:07:20.480
that I was in the fact that my low social, uh, motivation, my low social motivation, I thought

922
01:07:20.480 --> 01:07:24.960
that that was me as well, but a lot of that was self-protection and it was simply based off of

923
01:07:24.960 --> 01:07:30.320
all of these beliefs that I had created. So my personality test was reflecting who I thought I

924
01:07:30.320 --> 01:07:35.120
was and who I thought I needed to be to protect myself and to go out into the world and accomplish

925
01:07:35.120 --> 01:07:40.640
certain things. Right. Um, and, but it doesn't mean that that's actually who I am. They don't,

926
01:07:40.640 --> 01:07:47.040
it doesn't reveal to you who you or other people are. It just shows you what people believe that

927
01:07:47.040 --> 01:07:50.720
they are, who they believe that they are, and there'll be acting according to how they believe

928
01:07:50.720 --> 01:07:55.760
that they are. Right. So that, so that's how you can, that's why it's helpful is it helps

929
01:07:55.760 --> 01:07:59.600
you understand why they're acting the way that they are or why you're acting the way they are,

930
01:07:59.600 --> 01:08:03.600
because they reveal what you believe about yourself or what they believe about themselves,

931
01:08:03.600 --> 01:08:10.160
but it does not reflect your actual identity and who God created you to be. That is only when the

932
01:08:10.160 --> 01:08:15.440
Lord, when you're fully submitted to the Lord. Um, okay. So here are some examples. I feel like

933
01:08:15.440 --> 01:08:21.120
I'm just moving so quickly because you know, me, I always have had so much to say. Um, and, uh,

934
01:08:21.760 --> 01:08:24.720
that I always think it would be, Oh, it'd be helpful if they knew this and be helpful if

935
01:08:24.720 --> 01:08:31.680
they knew that and help them practically walk it out. If, um, uh, uh, if they do these things.

936
01:08:31.680 --> 01:08:36.800
Okay. So here's some examples. Um, I'm just going to mention three time, personal possessions and

937
01:08:36.800 --> 01:08:41.680
relationships. So for time, remember that it's yours to determine how you want to use it. So

938
01:08:41.680 --> 01:08:47.279
these are examples of how you can, uh, practical examples of things in your life that you have to

939
01:08:47.279 --> 01:08:53.200
make decisions on there that you can then recognize, Oh, this is how I can, and these are

940
01:08:53.200 --> 01:08:59.760
some areas in which I can choose to, um, reown who it is that I am and be able to practically walk

941
01:08:59.760 --> 01:09:06.560
this out and act on it. So it's yours to determine how you use it. And remember, use your time

942
01:09:07.680 --> 01:09:13.840
where you value on, on, on your value systems, not on what you don't value based on other people's

943
01:09:13.840 --> 01:09:20.240
requests or social pressures or whatever, uh, on what you uniquely value, what you want to create

944
01:09:20.240 --> 01:09:26.000
the life you want to create for yourself and your family. Um, and remember your time is not,

945
01:09:26.000 --> 01:09:31.439
is not been taken from you. You are choosing how you use your time. You don't like it. If you feel

946
01:09:31.439 --> 01:09:37.359
pressured and obligated, take that responsibility back and decide, and either, and there might be

947
01:09:37.359 --> 01:09:43.439
certain things that you feel obligated to do that. If you stop, and if you take your power back,

948
01:09:43.439 --> 01:09:47.359
you realize, no, no, no, that's I get to decide how I want to do that. You might realize, no,

949
01:09:47.359 --> 01:09:51.279
I do still want to do that, but now I I'm not doing it because I'm obligated. I'm doing it

950
01:09:51.279 --> 01:09:55.760
because that's my actual choice. That is something that I choose of how I want to

951
01:09:55.760 --> 01:09:59.920
spend my time because of what it gets me. It creates X, Y, and Z.

952
01:10:00.000 --> 01:10:04.160
the firm of an experience for me and my family or for me or, or whatever.

953
01:10:04.680 --> 01:10:08.960
Um, and, uh, but make sure that you take responsibility back of making that

954
01:10:08.960 --> 01:10:14.320
decision instead of releasing responsibility of it, um, outsourcing it

955
01:10:14.320 --> 01:10:19.080
to make you out of control because you feel obligated, so your time

956
01:10:19.080 --> 01:10:20.240
has not been taken from you.

957
01:10:20.240 --> 01:10:22.160
You're the one who's choosing how to use your time.

958
01:10:22.720 --> 01:10:26.280
It's not taken from you and it's not owned by others, even children.

959
01:10:27.280 --> 01:10:29.040
A lot of times moms can feel that way.

960
01:10:29.040 --> 01:10:31.240
They can feel like, Oh my goodness, I just have to, because I have

961
01:10:31.240 --> 01:10:32.360
these little kids and whatever.

962
01:10:32.400 --> 01:10:36.160
No, it is still your time, but what kind of a life do you want

963
01:10:36.160 --> 01:10:38.040
to create for your children?

964
01:10:38.480 --> 01:10:40.880
What kind of a home environment do you want to create for your

965
01:10:40.880 --> 01:10:42.560
children or, you know, for work?

966
01:10:42.600 --> 01:10:46.760
What if your work doesn't own you, your work is submitting to you.

967
01:10:46.760 --> 01:10:49.600
All of these things that they want you to do, you get to choose.

968
01:10:49.600 --> 01:10:50.760
Are you going to do those?

969
01:10:50.760 --> 01:10:55.000
Or are you going to bear or are you going to choose to do something else?

970
01:10:55.360 --> 01:10:58.360
Well, if you do something else, then your boss is going to respond in this way.

971
01:10:58.680 --> 01:11:00.280
And you're just like, well, that's not the kind of life that

972
01:11:00.280 --> 01:11:01.360
I want to create for myself.

973
01:11:01.360 --> 01:11:02.920
I'm going to, I want to be helpful.

974
01:11:03.160 --> 01:11:05.800
I want to, I want to be proactive in my job.

975
01:11:06.040 --> 01:11:12.800
I want to, um, uh, you know, I, I went to, Oh, I want to claim what it is.

976
01:11:12.800 --> 01:11:16.160
I want to claim my time because this is how my boss presented to

977
01:11:16.160 --> 01:11:17.320
me what they wanted me to do.

978
01:11:17.320 --> 01:11:19.840
And I chose to take up that project.

979
01:11:20.160 --> 01:11:23.520
So I'm not being obligated to, I'm the one who chose whether

980
01:11:23.520 --> 01:11:24.600
or not I wanted to take it.

981
01:11:25.480 --> 01:11:27.120
Now, would I prefer to take it?

982
01:11:27.240 --> 01:11:30.360
No, but I would bet.

983
01:11:30.440 --> 01:11:33.480
I mean, meaning like you may not want to, you may not want to

984
01:11:33.480 --> 01:11:34.800
do what they wanted you to do.

985
01:11:35.080 --> 01:11:38.000
But so you don't have to take it, but it would mean that you'd be

986
01:11:38.000 --> 01:11:39.240
living this kind of life over here.

987
01:11:39.240 --> 01:11:40.800
Well, I don't want to live this kind of life over here.

988
01:11:40.800 --> 01:11:42.840
I want to live a kind of life that da da da da da.

989
01:11:43.120 --> 01:11:43.480
Okay.

990
01:11:43.480 --> 01:11:44.600
Does this fall in line with that?

991
01:11:44.600 --> 01:11:45.200
Yes, it does.

992
01:11:45.200 --> 01:11:48.720
So therefore I'm going to choose of my own free will to take on this project.

993
01:11:49.800 --> 01:11:53.120
Again, if y'all have any questions about how this works, um, just like, uh, you

994
01:11:53.160 --> 01:11:59.760
know, more detail, um, if y'all have more specific life examples that you want me

995
01:11:59.760 --> 01:12:04.080
to, um, help discern, you know, just, uh, and, and meaning like how to apply

996
01:12:04.080 --> 01:12:06.720
these types of principles to those specific examples, just let me know.

997
01:12:07.280 --> 01:12:10.840
So personal possessions, we talked about this, I think last time.

998
01:12:11.320 --> 01:12:14.000
Um, so this, I'm just going to do a side note on it.

999
01:12:14.000 --> 01:12:18.440
It's not a deep dive, even though I could do a whole program, just

1000
01:12:18.440 --> 01:12:22.360
about personal possessions and what I've learned and walked out of my own life.

1001
01:12:22.360 --> 01:12:25.040
It was shockingly amazing to me.

1002
01:12:25.520 --> 01:12:31.720
But, um, so think about your possessions and why you have certain things.

1003
01:12:31.760 --> 01:12:32.800
You don't have to think about all of them.

1004
01:12:32.800 --> 01:12:35.720
Just start thinking about it in general, certain things that you have.

1005
01:12:36.000 --> 01:12:37.600
Me, I went through everything that I owned.

1006
01:12:37.960 --> 01:12:40.160
Um, and, but start, start with that.

1007
01:12:40.160 --> 01:12:44.040
I don't know your clothes or your favorite thing or your least favorite

1008
01:12:44.040 --> 01:12:47.320
thing, you know, or stuff that you have around the house that you're like,

1009
01:12:47.320 --> 01:12:48.480
I really wish you didn't have this.

1010
01:12:48.760 --> 01:12:53.400
And use your, um, and, and use those things to help you discern.

1011
01:12:54.280 --> 01:12:57.680
Things about yourself, because they're all saying something about yourself.

1012
01:12:58.080 --> 01:13:02.240
Um, think about why, if you can't release certain things, because

1013
01:13:02.240 --> 01:13:04.960
they mean so much to you, maybe it's nostalgia or whatever.

1014
01:13:04.960 --> 01:13:07.280
Why can't you bear to release those things?

1015
01:13:07.920 --> 01:13:10.600
So why are certain things important for you to keep?

1016
01:13:11.160 --> 01:13:15.440
Um, I would recommend that again, owning yourself is, is choosing

1017
01:13:15.440 --> 01:13:19.680
that something's part of your life, choosing to keep it, not being

1018
01:13:19.680 --> 01:13:21.880
afraid of it, not being with you.

1019
01:13:22.200 --> 01:13:24.840
Not it's not being afraid of, of losing it.

1020
01:13:25.080 --> 01:13:26.720
That's not owning your own life.

1021
01:13:26.720 --> 01:13:30.760
That's feeling reactive and, and, and feeling a life that's

1022
01:13:30.760 --> 01:13:33.440
just, uh, reactive and responsive.

1023
01:13:34.280 --> 01:13:38.400
Where something else, this material possession has control over you

1024
01:13:38.400 --> 01:13:40.720
has, um, owns you in some way.

1025
01:13:41.040 --> 01:13:44.800
Um, it has a hold of your emotions and it can affect you.

1026
01:13:44.800 --> 01:13:49.720
So if you lose it, it can affect something deep within you, and

1027
01:13:49.720 --> 01:13:51.440
that can be indicative of a problem.

1028
01:13:51.440 --> 01:13:55.320
It can be indicative of the fact that we're being enslaved by, um, things

1029
01:13:55.320 --> 01:14:00.800
that by meaning that we've given to certain possessions, so you want to

1030
01:14:00.800 --> 01:14:08.440
keep things because you want them to have a, you want to proact, you want

1031
01:14:08.640 --> 01:14:12.000
them to play an active role in creating your current life.

1032
01:14:13.000 --> 01:14:16.400
And so ask yourself, is this symbolizing?

1033
01:14:16.400 --> 01:14:17.960
So these are some positive things.

1034
01:14:18.400 --> 01:14:22.320
Does it symbolize a part of yourself that you wish you could express, but

1035
01:14:22.320 --> 01:14:25.360
haven't been able to like maybe a particular hobby that you've always

1036
01:14:25.360 --> 01:14:29.080
wanted to do and that you just really haven't spent the time on in the past

1037
01:14:29.080 --> 01:14:33.480
few years to do, but you just, you're always inspired and motivated and

1038
01:14:33.480 --> 01:14:35.680
there's something always inside of you that just kind of lights

1039
01:14:35.680 --> 01:14:36.920
on fire whenever you see it.

1040
01:14:36.920 --> 01:14:37.200
Right.

1041
01:14:37.920 --> 01:14:41.960
Is, is that it, or, um, does it symbolize a part of you that

1042
01:14:41.960 --> 01:14:42.960
you wish you could express?

1043
01:14:42.960 --> 01:14:46.240
So we get, it's an aspect of yourself that you feel that you need to honor

1044
01:14:46.240 --> 01:14:49.720
or that you hope that you'll get to honor, um, with more, uh, with more

1045
01:14:49.720 --> 01:14:50.920
time later on down the road.

1046
01:14:51.160 --> 01:14:54.720
So therefore you want to keep it because it's just having that book

1047
01:14:54.960 --> 01:14:59.360
isn't it, or those, those items is an expression of what you want to do.

1048
01:14:59.360 --> 01:15:02.040
So, um, I think that's, that's a really good question.

1049
01:15:00.000 --> 01:15:05.160
It is how you're able to express that part of yourself right now.

1050
01:15:05.160 --> 01:15:08.400
It's the limit to which you can express it and you hope to be able to express it in more

1051
01:15:08.400 --> 01:15:09.520
in the future.

1052
01:15:09.520 --> 01:15:15.520
Or is it an at, or is the thing that you have maybe even an active ingredient in the life

1053
01:15:15.520 --> 01:15:19.560
you're intentionally trying to create for yourself, what you don't want to hold on to

1054
01:15:19.560 --> 01:15:26.920
are things that are no longer you are no longer that are either negatively impacting your

1055
01:15:26.920 --> 01:15:32.120
life or are not in alignment with the life you're trying to create because those things

1056
01:15:32.120 --> 01:15:38.320
can be hindering where it is that you're that you go and they can be holding you back.

1057
01:15:38.320 --> 01:15:44.000
It depends on the thing, but generally speaking, it can be holding you back.

1058
01:15:44.000 --> 01:15:48.500
There are certain things like, like nostalgia from like our childhood that are just special

1059
01:15:48.500 --> 01:15:55.320
to us just because, well, you know, this bit, but you'll find that they're usually things

1060
01:15:55.320 --> 01:16:03.200
that you like and that are very special to not that create fear that you'll lose.

1061
01:16:03.200 --> 01:16:07.920
That shows there's some kind of an unhealthy connection or a wound associated with that,

1062
01:16:07.920 --> 01:16:11.880
that you haven't dealt with associated with that thing that it reminds me that you haven't

1063
01:16:11.880 --> 01:16:12.880
quite dealt with.

1064
01:16:12.880 --> 01:16:20.360
Um, so, and again, you're then enslaved to that, uh, that, that possession is indicative

1065
01:16:20.360 --> 01:16:22.600
of something that you're enslaved to in your life.

1066
01:16:22.600 --> 01:16:28.000
You're not owning, um, that part of yourself, um, okay.

1067
01:16:28.000 --> 01:16:32.400
So in whoops, oh, maybe it wanted to be more.

1068
01:16:32.400 --> 01:16:34.880
Um, so the last thing is relationships.

1069
01:16:34.880 --> 01:16:39.720
Remember that you own that, that you need to own your part in your relationships with

1070
01:16:39.720 --> 01:16:45.680
others and get to choose what you say and do in relationship to them.

1071
01:16:45.680 --> 01:16:56.120
So, uh, don't let other people and how they might react to you, uh, determine your interaction

1072
01:16:56.120 --> 01:16:57.120
with them.

1073
01:16:57.120 --> 01:16:58.120
Well, they might leave.

1074
01:16:58.120 --> 01:16:59.120
Well, then they own you.

1075
01:16:59.120 --> 01:17:02.800
You're being, you're enslaved in that relationship.

1076
01:17:02.800 --> 01:17:08.720
Um, their decisions are determining your wellbeing and whether or not you're okay.

1077
01:17:08.720 --> 01:17:10.160
That's a problem.

1078
01:17:10.160 --> 01:17:17.560
Um, so, uh, you need to choose to have relationships and be with people because they're your choice,

1079
01:17:17.560 --> 01:17:18.560
not out of obligation.

1080
01:17:18.560 --> 01:17:22.520
Um, and their choices don't determine yours.

1081
01:17:22.520 --> 01:17:23.600
Okay.

1082
01:17:23.600 --> 01:17:28.480
So, um, keep in mind that the only way you will own yourself is you have to choose to

1083
01:17:28.480 --> 01:17:30.360
own yourself.

1084
01:17:30.360 --> 01:17:33.680
People aren't going to give you permission to own yourself, especially if you're being

1085
01:17:33.680 --> 01:17:38.120
controlled by someone emotionally, like say for instance, in a relationship with a sibling

1086
01:17:38.120 --> 01:17:43.280
or parents or with, uh, a friend at work or with a neighbor or with your roommate or

1087
01:17:43.280 --> 01:17:47.960
whatever that, um, they're not going to give you, if you're being controlled by them, they're

1088
01:17:47.960 --> 01:17:50.680
not going to release that and give you control.

1089
01:17:50.680 --> 01:17:52.440
You're going to have to claim that for you.

1090
01:17:52.440 --> 01:17:55.440
And no one can give you that only God can.

1091
01:17:55.440 --> 01:17:57.920
So you have to claim it only from him.

1092
01:17:57.920 --> 01:18:00.480
It will not come first from anyone else.

1093
01:18:00.480 --> 01:18:06.800
You might get encouragement from some people, but no one will give you permission, especially

1094
01:18:06.800 --> 01:18:10.200
the people you have the greatest trouble with people that are going to come against

1095
01:18:10.200 --> 01:18:13.600
you whenever you like, rise up and try to have a voice that coming as you, they're not

1096
01:18:13.600 --> 01:18:21.120
going to, they're not going to, uh, be like, well, you know, I should give you permission

1097
01:18:21.120 --> 01:18:22.120
to do that.

1098
01:18:22.120 --> 01:18:23.800
No, they're not going to, you have to take it.

1099
01:18:23.800 --> 01:18:28.800
It's very hard you, and all you have to do is you don't have to client require that they

1100
01:18:28.800 --> 01:18:29.800
respect you.

1101
01:18:29.800 --> 01:18:31.320
That's not what we're talking about.

1102
01:18:31.320 --> 01:18:36.920
You respect yourself and you let them deal with the aftermath, the risk that how they

1103
01:18:36.920 --> 01:18:40.640
want to respond, but you hold true to you.

1104
01:18:40.640 --> 01:18:42.520
Um, okay.

1105
01:18:42.520 --> 01:18:48.480
So, uh, um, I'm just going to mention this when you're waiting for things, when you're

1106
01:18:48.480 --> 01:18:54.320
waiting for things to happen and to change in your life, it, you cannot, it's not giving

1107
01:18:54.320 --> 01:18:56.360
up when you're waiting.

1108
01:18:56.360 --> 01:18:57.640
You cannot give up.

1109
01:18:57.640 --> 01:19:00.000
If you give up, that's not waiting.

1110
01:19:00.000 --> 01:19:01.000
It's a defeatist attitude.

1111
01:19:01.000 --> 01:19:04.320
You've given up, you know, you're not having faith, et cetera.

1112
01:19:04.320 --> 01:19:10.240
You need to wait assertively, proactively, and intentionally choosing.

1113
01:19:10.240 --> 01:19:13.160
It needs to be an active thing that you're doing.

1114
01:19:13.160 --> 01:19:18.240
Waiting needs to be an active thing that you do, not a passive thing that you do.

1115
01:19:18.240 --> 01:19:22.560
Just waiting for something outside of you to, to change.

1116
01:19:22.560 --> 01:19:25.200
Waiting is an active thing that we do.

1117
01:19:25.200 --> 01:19:31.440
Um, also need to, uh, talk to the Lord and ask him to help you stop doubting yourself

1118
01:19:31.440 --> 01:19:36.360
because as you doubt yourself, you have stifled your intuition and you're not, and you don't

1119
01:19:36.360 --> 01:19:43.000
have as much access to not just your gut feeling, but what I, but your spirit, what your spirit

1120
01:19:43.000 --> 01:19:47.160
is saying, because you're always, because you're doubting yourself, you need to choose

1121
01:19:47.160 --> 01:19:49.480
that you are who God says that you are.

1122
01:19:49.480 --> 01:19:53.360
And, um, and to get, be getting to know that person and to allow that person who it is

1123
01:19:53.440 --> 01:19:59.440
that you are, like what we talked about last time to rise up and man, and express itself.

1124
01:19:59.440 --> 01:19:59.960
Sometimes it'll come in the.

1125
01:20:00.000 --> 01:20:04.620
form of emotion. Sometimes it will come in the form of just a knowing about something.

1126
01:20:04.620 --> 01:20:09.440
Do not doubt yourself. Give it honor. Submit it to the Lord to ask him, Lord, is this even

1127
01:20:09.440 --> 01:20:16.360
valid? Is this true? But don't squelch it and doubt yourself. Present it as an option

1128
01:20:16.360 --> 01:20:20.440
to the Lord. Instead of doubting it and wondering and questioning it, don't question it. Just

1129
01:20:20.440 --> 01:20:25.980
take it before the Lord and see if it aligns with him. Instead of doubting it and trying

1130
01:20:25.980 --> 01:20:30.300
to figure it out yourself, let the Lord figure it out. See if it aligns with what God is

1131
01:20:30.300 --> 01:20:38.100
telling you. That's how you can only follow the things in you that are true without doubting

1132
01:20:38.100 --> 01:20:44.900
yourself. Instead of figuring it out on your own, present it up next to the Lord. You need

1133
01:20:44.900 --> 01:20:51.180
to honor yourself and your intuition in order to be able to regain that.

1134
01:20:51.180 --> 01:20:58.220
The last thing before I talk about the practice, the last thing is remember to is parent yourself.

1135
01:20:58.220 --> 01:21:02.980
And that's what our practice is going to be about. So parent yourself. There's be gentle

1136
01:21:02.980 --> 01:21:07.980
with yourself, provide a safe place for yourself so that you can own you, right? You need to

1137
01:21:07.980 --> 01:21:12.220
reintegrate, so to speak, all the different aspects of yourself that are at all different

1138
01:21:12.220 --> 01:21:18.540
ages of where that's that got stunted in their growth, where they were very deeply hurt.

1139
01:21:18.540 --> 01:21:22.660
You need to bring all of those different places up into maturity and be a safe place

1140
01:21:22.660 --> 01:21:27.140
for yourself to grow up in those areas, to heal in those areas. You need to be a safe

1141
01:21:27.140 --> 01:21:31.380
place for your soul and your body to come into a belief about God instead of standing

1142
01:21:31.380 --> 01:21:35.660
and staying in unbelief. So there are a few different things. Some of them are things

1143
01:21:35.660 --> 01:21:39.820
that our fathers do for us. And some are things that our mothers do for us. So we need to

1144
01:21:39.820 --> 01:21:44.940
be those things for ourselves. So things that our mothers do for us is you, you want to

1145
01:21:44.940 --> 01:21:50.620
be on gentle with yourself, be fully accepting. Remember, by the way, remember that this owning

1146
01:21:50.620 --> 01:21:55.940
yourself is the last thing to do. The first thing is accept yourself fully, then get to

1147
01:21:55.940 --> 01:22:00.660
know yourself, allowing yourself to fully express yourself without, without stifling

1148
01:22:00.660 --> 01:22:06.740
it, etc. And then proactively do something with yourself, own yourself, claim yourself,

1149
01:22:06.740 --> 01:22:11.640
you know, honor yourself, accept yourself as being this thing and act on it, right?

1150
01:22:11.640 --> 01:22:16.520
You can't do that without doing the other two things. First, you can only do this to

1151
01:22:16.520 --> 01:22:20.080
the degree that you've done the other things that you've accepted yourself and that you've

1152
01:22:20.080 --> 01:22:24.920
allowed yourself to express yourself and you fully and you fully engage with and interact

1153
01:22:24.920 --> 01:22:31.280
with those pieces. That is the only time in the only way in which you can then own yourself

1154
01:22:31.280 --> 01:22:35.440
in those areas. You can only own yourself and claim yourself in those areas in which

1155
01:22:35.440 --> 01:22:40.040
you've done these other two. So, so don't skip those other two and just keep trying

1156
01:22:40.040 --> 01:22:46.600
to own yourself. It will not work and it'll create damage. Do the other two first and

1157
01:22:46.600 --> 01:22:50.960
then do this one and then only do it to the degree that you've done the other two. And

1158
01:22:50.960 --> 01:22:55.920
this, this you won't do overnight. You will do this in layers and over a great amount

1159
01:22:55.920 --> 01:23:00.160
of time in various areas of your life, but just do it more and more and more. And this

1160
01:23:00.160 --> 01:23:03.880
will allow you to step into more and more freedom and maturity in the Lord. So anyway,

1161
01:23:03.880 --> 01:23:07.440
in this owning yourself, one of the things that we want to do is we need to learn how

1162
01:23:07.440 --> 01:23:11.480
in this, in this process of learning to own ourselves into like claiming more and more

1163
01:23:11.480 --> 01:23:16.040
of ourselves. We're claiming those parts of ourselves that feel subject to other people

1164
01:23:16.040 --> 01:23:21.880
that are still children, right? That may have got Senate at five or at 10 or at 15. So be

1165
01:23:21.880 --> 01:23:28.200
gentle with yourself, be a safe place. Those are two things that mothers do be very nurturing,

1166
01:23:28.200 --> 01:23:32.360
right? Now things that our fathers do for us, which is something that we need to do

1167
01:23:32.360 --> 01:23:38.360
for ourselves and be for ourselves is we need to protect ourselves, fight for you,

1168
01:23:38.360 --> 01:23:44.360
protect you, um, and, uh, protect your soul, protect your body, protect your emotions,

1169
01:23:44.360 --> 01:23:50.880
protect your, protect what has been given to you to, um, as your first, uh, as the first

1170
01:23:50.880 --> 01:23:56.400
aspect of your kingdom, the first domain in your kingdom. Um, you also just like our fathers,

1171
01:23:56.400 --> 01:24:02.720
you need to be firm and anchor firm, not, not angry. Don't expect everything to get

1172
01:24:02.720 --> 01:24:07.440
out of line. And I'm just going to whip you into shape and, and I don't, don't, you know,

1173
01:24:07.440 --> 01:24:12.240
don't cross the line and, you know, and, and better not. And I'm watching you and I knew

1174
01:24:12.240 --> 01:24:20.000
none of that expect them to respond appropriately to you. That all you have to do is be definitive.

1175
01:24:20.960 --> 01:24:27.440
No wishy-washiness. Oh, come on. No, no, no, no. When you engage with that aspect of, uh,

1176
01:24:27.440 --> 01:24:33.440
when you engage with yourself doing these things, it needs to be very definitive.

1177
01:24:33.440 --> 01:24:39.280
That makes people feel safe. No wishy-washiness strong decisions. That's what I'm talking about

1178
01:24:39.280 --> 01:24:44.880
being firm. I don't mean firm isn't harsh. I mean, firm is in definitive where there's no wiggle

1179
01:24:44.880 --> 01:24:50.160
room. Wiggle room doesn't make anybody feel safe. The squishy washing is like, well, how are you

1180
01:24:50.160 --> 01:24:54.960
going to react? You know, is this okay? Sometimes I'm not okay. Other times be definitive, give,

1181
01:24:54.960 --> 01:24:59.760
give yourself a safe place to feel protected and to always know what to expect from.

1182
01:25:00.000 --> 01:25:03.920
you to always know that you're going to be consistent. You're going to be a consistent

1183
01:25:03.920 --> 01:25:08.000
parent. You're going to consistently protect. You're going to consistently provide. You're

1184
01:25:08.000 --> 01:25:14.880
going to consistently make certain things good for them, right? So be firm, be an anchor.

1185
01:25:15.520 --> 01:25:22.640
In other words, be solid, be dependable, be reliable, be unwavering, be these things to you.

1186
01:25:22.640 --> 01:25:27.680
If you say you're going to do something, do it. If you say you're going to do something for

1187
01:25:27.680 --> 01:25:31.840
yourself, if you're going to be something to yourself, if you say that you're going to interact

1188
01:25:31.840 --> 01:25:38.000
like this in a particular situation, do it. Otherwise you won't trust you. Your soul won't

1189
01:25:38.000 --> 01:25:43.280
trust you. Your body won't trust you. And then your body will manifest all kinds of sickness

1190
01:25:43.280 --> 01:25:53.520
and fear and anxiety, et cetera. Why? Because you aren't consistent and you're not dependable.

1191
01:25:54.480 --> 01:26:03.680
So give yourself that. Be dependable, be consistent. Okay. So also we're at the age

1192
01:26:03.680 --> 01:26:07.920
emotionally, and you'll probably know this, that we're at the age emotionally that we were physically

1193
01:26:07.920 --> 01:26:14.240
when the thing happened and we made an agreement. So you need to go back to that aspect of how old

1194
01:26:14.240 --> 01:26:19.040
you were then and what you made an agreement with and make a different choice coming out of

1195
01:26:19.040 --> 01:26:27.760
agreement. And so this, and so what you're going to have to do is you're going to have to make a

1196
01:26:27.760 --> 01:26:34.000
risk. You're going to have to take a risk. You're going to have to abandon the old forms of security

1197
01:26:34.000 --> 01:26:40.320
and safety. And you're going to have to choose new form of security. You're going to, which is

1198
01:26:40.320 --> 01:26:45.120
going to have to be the Lord. And what he says is true and that you're going to have and, and just

1199
01:26:45.120 --> 01:26:51.920
choose. Okay. He gave me, me as my first domain in my kingdom. And I need to choose that first. I need

1200
01:26:51.920 --> 01:26:57.200
to choose to honor that. I need to choose to claim that before I can even give all of this,

1201
01:26:58.560 --> 01:27:03.760
you know, that other people are requesting, or, you know, that I feel that life is demanding

1202
01:27:03.760 --> 01:27:09.920
them, your, whatever, I have to make this choice first. And so, and it's going to be hard because

1203
01:27:09.920 --> 01:27:14.400
it feels like everything is going to go to hell in a hand basket, unless you take care of it and

1204
01:27:14.400 --> 01:27:19.520
you abandon yourself first, you have to choose that, that, that it will be taken care of better.

1205
01:27:19.520 --> 01:27:24.560
And you will have what you need for this. If you choose this first, that's what I mean. You have

1206
01:27:24.560 --> 01:27:31.760
to choose a new form of security. Your security needs to be God said, therefore I will choose

1207
01:27:31.760 --> 01:27:36.960
that. And therefore I will act according to what it is. He said, I will choose me first.

1208
01:27:38.240 --> 01:27:41.840
And this is not a selfish thing, by the way, that's not what I'm talking about. I'm not trying

1209
01:27:41.920 --> 01:27:47.600
to talk about being selfish. I'm choosing owning yourself and making proactive decisions from that

1210
01:27:47.600 --> 01:27:53.920
place. The proactive decisions you make from that place will very often be, will be more

1211
01:27:54.720 --> 01:28:00.560
servant, like more loving, more serving of others than you were when you did, when you were doing

1212
01:28:00.560 --> 01:28:05.760
everything out of obligation. I promised you that, you know, why? Because that's the character of God

1213
01:28:06.720 --> 01:28:12.240
is to, is that the more that you own yourself and the more that you step into your Kingship,

1214
01:28:12.240 --> 01:28:20.000
the more of a servant that you are, you rule by serving, but you can't serve healthily until

1215
01:28:20.000 --> 01:28:26.560
you're that King first, then it's a healthy servant. And because also as a servant, you,

1216
01:28:26.560 --> 01:28:31.040
because you're a servant, who's the King, you have everything you need to be able to provide.

1217
01:28:31.040 --> 01:28:35.840
But if you're not a King first, you don't have what's needed in order to give to other people.

1218
01:28:35.840 --> 01:28:39.200
You don't have access to it. You don't have access to the resources. Why? Because you're just a

1219
01:28:39.200 --> 01:28:45.920
slave. And let's see. So you choose new form of security. You make your own choices based on what

1220
01:28:45.920 --> 01:28:51.920
God says to you. And then you act on what God told you and you chose in faith was your new reality.

1221
01:28:52.640 --> 01:28:58.400
And then, and you're doing this instead of feeling subject to others. Okay. So last thing, we're

1222
01:28:58.400 --> 01:29:02.640
going to talk about the practice. So this is the only practice that I have in this book that

1223
01:29:02.640 --> 01:29:08.560
actually gives you something specific written in here. I have done this myself. In fact, the way

1224
01:29:08.560 --> 01:29:13.040
that I came up with these questions is these are the questions that I asked myself. This is time

1225
01:29:13.040 --> 01:29:21.440
that you would spend, that you would set aside, that you would set aside and you would that you

1226
01:29:21.440 --> 01:29:28.640
would intentionally meet with or go back to and talk to, you know, you're the little one within

1227
01:29:28.640 --> 01:29:38.320
you that the child that's afraid and scared and whose growth got stunted emotionally when it got

1228
01:29:38.320 --> 01:29:44.880
hurt and afraid, and it came into an agreement somewhere with some lie about yourself or about

1229
01:29:44.880 --> 01:29:51.600
God. So the first that I recommend is just saying, Hey, little one, you know, can you believe how

1230
01:29:51.600 --> 01:29:57.520
you've grown up? Here's who you are, what your life looks like. So present your grown up self

1231
01:29:57.520 --> 01:29:59.920
to that little, to that little girl or little.

1232
01:30:00.000 --> 01:30:06.400
boy, you know, present yourself to them and just be like, and just be like, Hey, look,

1233
01:30:06.400 --> 01:30:08.520
this is who you've grown up to be.

1234
01:30:08.520 --> 01:30:12.040
You remember how you didn't know what life is going to look like and who you're going

1235
01:30:12.040 --> 01:30:16.840
to marry or what job you were going to have or what you were going to be like, or how

1236
01:30:16.840 --> 01:30:20.760
people were going to like you or what you're going to grow your dress and style was going

1237
01:30:20.760 --> 01:30:21.760
to be or whatever.

1238
01:30:21.760 --> 01:30:23.680
Well, this is, this is it.

1239
01:30:23.680 --> 01:30:25.360
These are the decisions that you've made.

1240
01:30:25.360 --> 01:30:26.840
These are the things that have happened.

1241
01:30:26.840 --> 01:30:28.740
This is how people respond to you.

1242
01:30:28.740 --> 01:30:33.340
This is the life you now have, and you'll be amazed when you look at yourself through

1243
01:30:33.340 --> 01:30:39.660
those child's eyes or your younger self's eyes, you'll be amazed at, at how much God

1244
01:30:39.660 --> 01:30:41.180
has done in your life.

1245
01:30:41.180 --> 01:30:45.660
The type of things that you always dreamed of as a kid and the dreams that you're actually

1246
01:30:45.660 --> 01:30:46.660
now getting to live.

1247
01:30:46.660 --> 01:30:53.740
And you present that to, to them, you know, is like, Hey, look, I'm you all grown up.

1248
01:30:53.740 --> 01:30:56.380
I'm you in the future that you didn't know.

1249
01:30:56.380 --> 01:30:58.340
And now I've come back to talk to you.

1250
01:30:58.940 --> 01:31:02.380
I've come now back to give you, now that I've lived all this life, I've come back to give

1251
01:31:02.380 --> 01:31:08.260
you security and comfort and permission, because I'm the only one who can give you permission.

1252
01:31:08.260 --> 01:31:14.020
I'm the only one who can give you permission to let go of your hurts and to heal and to

1253
01:31:14.020 --> 01:31:19.620
believe certain things because our parents can't give us that permission.

1254
01:31:19.620 --> 01:31:25.380
God gave us ourselves to give us that permission and God gives us that permission first.

1255
01:31:25.380 --> 01:31:29.460
Remember in our spirit, and it's now our spirit is giving ourselves that permission

1256
01:31:29.460 --> 01:31:33.700
to our flesh or remember our flesh, meaning like certain parts of ourselves, certain parts

1257
01:31:33.700 --> 01:31:38.540
of our flesh, certain parts of our emotions or whatever are stunted at five years old

1258
01:31:38.540 --> 01:31:42.260
or 10 years old or 15 years old or whatever.

1259
01:31:42.260 --> 01:31:46.500
So in the next one is little one, I'm here to give you a voice.

1260
01:31:46.500 --> 01:31:51.780
So what you're doing is you are giving, creating a safe place for that younger aspect of yourself

1261
01:31:51.780 --> 01:31:53.540
to express itself.

1262
01:31:53.540 --> 01:31:55.940
So little one, I'm here to give you a voice.

1263
01:31:55.940 --> 01:31:59.100
What do you want to tell me about what you want life to be like?

1264
01:31:59.100 --> 01:32:03.620
By that I'm not talking about what they want life to be like in the future, their current

1265
01:32:03.620 --> 01:32:10.500
situation and what they're afraid in, what life is like for them right now.

1266
01:32:10.500 --> 01:32:16.900
How do they want their current life back when they're five or however old you are back then?

1267
01:32:16.900 --> 01:32:20.340
What do you want your life right now to look like?

1268
01:32:20.340 --> 01:32:23.820
Not right now, where you are in the future, where you as an adult, I don't know.

1269
01:32:23.820 --> 01:32:30.540
Back then, go back to that time and be the adult back in that place, back in that moment

1270
01:32:30.540 --> 01:32:33.220
or that time in your life, whatever it is.

1271
01:32:33.220 --> 01:32:35.100
What do you want your life to be like?

1272
01:32:35.100 --> 01:32:38.740
Because of the child doesn't get to say, I don't, you know, very much.

1273
01:32:38.740 --> 01:32:39.740
I don't like this.

1274
01:32:39.740 --> 01:32:41.460
I want life to be like this.

1275
01:32:41.460 --> 01:32:44.980
Mommy and daddy, I want you to get along and mommy and daddy, I want you to do this.

1276
01:32:44.980 --> 01:32:47.420
And daddy, I want your, you know, your attention.

1277
01:32:47.420 --> 01:32:51.540
Or I'm just trying to remember things, you know, that have, that have wounded people

1278
01:32:51.540 --> 01:32:52.540
as children.

1279
01:32:52.540 --> 01:32:53.540
Right.

1280
01:32:53.540 --> 01:32:58.380
You know, mommy, I wanted you to do this or mommy, why won't you, you know, do this or

1281
01:32:58.380 --> 01:33:05.460
granddaddy or, or, or, you know, uncle or sibling or God, or, you know, it's going to

1282
01:33:05.460 --> 01:33:12.700
school teacher or, you know, whatever, let them express what they want life to be like,

1283
01:33:12.700 --> 01:33:15.980
like really and truly from a healthy place.

1284
01:33:16.540 --> 01:33:21.900
What need do they have that they're just crying out for, you know, who, who do they want attention

1285
01:33:21.900 --> 01:33:24.660
from and who do they just want to know?

1286
01:33:24.660 --> 01:33:30.420
You know, I just want to just be able to play in the same room with you without having to

1287
01:33:30.420 --> 01:33:34.820
go to another room to play, you know, or, or whatever, you know?

1288
01:33:34.820 --> 01:33:37.740
And so you ask him, you know, what do you want to tell me?

1289
01:33:37.740 --> 01:33:39.060
I'm giving you a voice.

1290
01:33:39.060 --> 01:33:42.540
What do you want to tell me about what you want life to be like?

1291
01:33:42.540 --> 01:33:45.100
What is happening in your life right now?

1292
01:33:45.100 --> 01:33:46.900
What is your life like?

1293
01:33:46.900 --> 01:33:47.900
What are you thinking?

1294
01:33:47.900 --> 01:33:49.620
How, how are you thinking about things?

1295
01:33:49.620 --> 01:33:51.980
You know, what are things, thoughts that are going through your head?

1296
01:33:51.980 --> 01:33:54.020
The good, the bad, and the ugly.

1297
01:33:54.020 --> 01:33:55.020
Let them be honest.

1298
01:33:55.020 --> 01:33:56.340
Remember, this is all about owning yourself.

1299
01:33:56.340 --> 01:34:02.460
You can't own yourself until you go back into these times and own what it is that you thought

1300
01:34:02.460 --> 01:34:06.940
and you felt and allowing just like last time, what we were talking about, knowing who you

1301
01:34:06.940 --> 01:34:08.860
are.

1302
01:34:08.860 --> 01:34:11.660
So how are you feeling right now?

1303
01:34:11.660 --> 01:34:13.980
You know, how are you feeling?

1304
01:34:13.980 --> 01:34:16.940
And what do you believe you're like?

1305
01:34:16.940 --> 01:34:18.780
How do you think about yourself?

1306
01:34:18.780 --> 01:34:20.860
You know, what kind of a person do you think that you are?

1307
01:34:20.860 --> 01:34:24.660
What do you believe you're really like as a person?

1308
01:34:24.660 --> 01:34:25.660
You believe you're good?

1309
01:34:25.660 --> 01:34:26.660
Do you believe you're evil?

1310
01:34:26.660 --> 01:34:28.500
Do you believe you're always bad?

1311
01:34:28.500 --> 01:34:30.540
You know, whatever.

1312
01:34:30.540 --> 01:34:31.660
And then ride all of that.

1313
01:34:31.660 --> 01:34:35.460
So I recommend for this, not doing bullet points.

1314
01:34:35.460 --> 01:34:36.460
You can, if you want.

1315
01:34:36.460 --> 01:34:38.300
Well, I say that I'm trying to remember.

1316
01:34:38.300 --> 01:34:43.460
No, I did do bullet points because what I did was I just kind of, I used to do whatever

1317
01:34:43.940 --> 01:34:44.940
you want, ride it out.

1318
01:34:44.940 --> 01:34:48.140
And you can do it the same way that you're doing conversations with God, where you write

1319
01:34:48.140 --> 01:34:51.820
one where you write what I forgot.

1320
01:34:51.820 --> 01:34:52.980
No, no, no.

1321
01:34:52.980 --> 01:34:53.980
That is what I did.

1322
01:34:53.980 --> 01:34:56.500
I did it the same way I did conversations with God.

1323
01:34:56.500 --> 01:34:58.420
I wrote, and this was very helpful.

1324
01:34:58.420 --> 01:34:59.420
So I do recommend this.

1325
01:35:00.000 --> 01:35:08.400
write out what you're asking the child, like as if your way of communicating with them is,

1326
01:35:09.280 --> 01:35:15.040
as is only if you write it down. So write it down and that is how they know what you're saying.

1327
01:35:15.040 --> 01:35:21.680
And then have, and then do the same thing with them. Have the child within you, you know, respond

1328
01:35:21.680 --> 01:35:28.240
by writing out what it is that they, that you really are thinking. So that will help you connect

1329
01:35:28.240 --> 01:35:34.160
with it a bit more. So usually I say to do the, you can do either or for this, definitely write

1330
01:35:34.160 --> 01:35:42.320
it out. I forgot that that was very helpful. And, and, okay, so, so do that. And so like you do with

1331
01:35:42.320 --> 01:35:48.800
your conversations with God and actually write it out. And then the next one is little one, what

1332
01:35:48.800 --> 01:35:54.960
this one here, little one, what do you wish for instead? What do you wish your life was like

1333
01:35:54.960 --> 01:36:01.280
instead? And what do you, and this is very important. What do you want me to be for you?

1334
01:36:02.400 --> 01:36:06.240
Because they wanted things from their dad. They wanted things from your mom, but you are now

1335
01:36:06.240 --> 01:36:13.680
offering to be anything they need. You were telling them, I will provide for you. I will

1336
01:36:13.680 --> 01:36:20.480
protect you. I will be a safe place where I will be the parent you wanted to have. I will interact

1337
01:36:20.480 --> 01:36:26.880
with you in the way you wanted people to interact with you. What do you want from me? And then you're

1338
01:36:26.880 --> 01:36:35.280
going to be that to them. And then the last one right here, little one, I'm so sorry for how I've

1339
01:36:35.280 --> 01:36:42.640
treated you. Because think about it. There's ways in which you have hated that little boy or that

1340
01:36:42.640 --> 01:36:52.640
little girl. There's ways that you have hated or, or resented that part of you or you, when you were

1341
01:36:52.640 --> 01:37:00.240
younger or you, when you did that or whatever. And so repent of that. You're not just apologizing.

1342
01:37:00.240 --> 01:37:04.720
You're repenting. You're saying, I'm no longer going to do that. I'm going to do the opposite.

1343
01:37:04.720 --> 01:37:11.760
I'm going to do whatever the Lord says to do. So here are the things I repent of to you and God

1344
01:37:12.400 --> 01:37:20.800
about. Here are the things I repent to you and God about and what I want to give and now be for you.

1345
01:37:21.920 --> 01:37:30.160
This will heal those parts of yourself because they will no longer feel rejected by you. And

1346
01:37:30.160 --> 01:37:35.440
they'll be allowed. There will finally be a parent, an adult, an authority. That's what I'm really

1347
01:37:35.440 --> 01:37:45.040
trying to say. An authority that is, is giving them permission to grow and is giving them

1348
01:37:45.040 --> 01:37:52.160
permission to heal. And then they'll choose to heal. It is wild. And it will happen like that.

1349
01:37:52.160 --> 01:37:57.840
It will happen so fast. It's amazing. Sometimes it'll happen. It'll, you should feel, you know,

1350
01:37:58.560 --> 01:38:02.640
some aspect of healing immediately, but definitely over the next few days.

1351
01:38:03.760 --> 01:38:08.400
Um, so, uh, anyway, that's what I would recommend. If you'll have any questions,

1352
01:38:08.400 --> 01:38:14.320
um, let me know. And then I love this last one. If God really is who he says that he is,

1353
01:38:14.320 --> 01:38:19.920
what kind of life do I choose to create? Because that is the foundation of us creating a life.

1354
01:38:20.480 --> 01:38:25.520
If God really is as good as he says he is, if he really is that good, if you're really is that

1355
01:38:25.520 --> 01:38:31.520
kind, if you really is that protective and providing for me, you know, who do, what kind

1356
01:38:31.520 --> 01:38:39.840
of a life would I choose to create? If that was my reality. So anyway, I have loved this program

1357
01:38:39.840 --> 01:38:44.800
with y'all. I hope that it's been very helpful. Um, I hope that it has. And I know that obviously

1358
01:38:44.800 --> 01:38:50.400
it's been, as we've been discussing that y'all have experienced huge, huge, major breakthroughs

1359
01:38:50.400 --> 01:38:55.680
in the way that I wanted. And I am so very grateful for that. Um, and so we have one more

1360
01:38:55.680 --> 01:39:01.440
time to be, uh, to get together and on Monday, we will definitely have that on Monday. I checked

1361
01:39:01.440 --> 01:39:08.080
and I moved my doctor's appointment. Um, so, um, I will see y'all at the usual time. And, um,

1362
01:39:08.080 --> 01:39:14.800
if y'all have any questions about all of this, um, mention those in the group chat or, um, you know,

1363
01:39:14.800 --> 01:39:19.280
and then, and then we'll also talk, be talking about stuff on Monday that I can answer questions

1364
01:39:19.280 --> 01:39:25.280
in the meantime as well. Um, and yeah, so just remember that all of the things that I included

1365
01:39:25.280 --> 01:39:30.880
in this are very foundational to just getting breakthrough. I hope none of it sounded complex.

1366
01:39:30.880 --> 01:39:37.440
I always just try to let people know, Hey, look, this, these are the things that will definitively

1367
01:39:37.440 --> 01:39:46.640
work. Um, but, uh, but I try and they're very simple, but I try to break them out and flush

1368
01:39:46.640 --> 01:39:52.800
them out as much as possible to help, you know, how to apply them to answer all of the questions

1369
01:39:52.800 --> 01:39:56.400
that you might present of like, yeah, but how does that fit in with dah, dah, dah, dah, dah.

1370
01:39:56.400 --> 01:39:59.840
So that's why it takes a while for me to explain everything, but everything is very simple.

1371
01:40:00.000 --> 01:40:05.000
Just look at all it just look at the table of contents, wherever that is.

1372
01:40:05.000 --> 01:40:24.000
You know that they're very simple, I've even even, I didn't even have to break them out as many into as many sessions as I did, but I wanted to give time to each one of these to really fully explain things, and so that they would be very so that you would

1373
01:40:24.000 --> 01:40:29.000
really know how to actually grab ahold of them and apply them.

1374
01:40:29.000 --> 01:40:37.000
So, just remember that everything always in your in your breakthrough of any future breakthroughs.

1375
01:40:37.000 --> 01:40:49.000
Everything always always always comes back to one thing faith, believing that God is who he says that he is, and that I am who God says that I am.

1376
01:40:49.000 --> 01:41:03.000
I promise you, everything only goes back to those two questions. And then of course you know we broke it out into what does God expected me, therefore, therefore because these things, what is God expected me, and then you know, right versus righteous,

1377
01:41:03.000 --> 01:41:17.000
you know there's the difference between quote unquote doing the right thing when are really all God wants us to do is to just be who we are, which is righteous, very effortless, and we need to learn to be me with God just be who it is that you are

1378
01:41:17.000 --> 01:41:26.000
and be that while you're with him don't, don't, don't deny yourself and then not be yourself and then not do that with it or do it and avoid the Lord.

1379
01:41:26.000 --> 01:41:40.000
Be fully yourself authentically yourself remember honesty with vulnerability in God's presence, and then know yourself, and that will teach you things about the Lord because who it is that you really are is not only born of him but carries him carries

1380
01:41:40.000 --> 01:41:52.000
his character carries his DNA. So when you know get to know yourself you get to know aspects of the Lord and expressions of him. And then if the last thing is important to own yourself.

1381
01:41:52.000 --> 01:42:04.000
And then that will be able that all of those things will help you get a breakthrough and get breakthrough and get unstuck.

1382
01:42:04.000 --> 01:42:10.000
So, anyway, love you all, and I will see you on Monday.